448 lines
63 KiB
HTML
448 lines
63 KiB
HTML
<!DOCTYPE html>
|
||
<html lang="" xml:lang="" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"><head>
|
||
<meta charset="utf-8"/>
|
||
<meta content="pandoc" name="generator"/>
|
||
<meta content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1.0, user-scalable=yes" name="viewport"/>
|
||
<title>13 June, 2022</title>
|
||
<style type="text/css">
|
||
code{white-space: pre-wrap;}
|
||
span.smallcaps{font-variant: small-caps;}
|
||
span.underline{text-decoration: underline;}
|
||
div.column{display: inline-block; vertical-align: top; width: 50%;}
|
||
</style>
|
||
<title>Daily-Dose</title><meta content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1.0" name="viewport"/><link href="styles/simple.css" rel="stylesheet"/><link href="../styles/simple.css" rel="stylesheet"/><style>*{overflow-x:hidden;}</style><link href="https://unpkg.com/aos@2.3.1/dist/aos.css" rel="stylesheet"/><script src="https://unpkg.com/aos@2.3.1/dist/aos.js"></script></head>
|
||
<body>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-down" id="daily-dose">Daily-Dose</h1>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" data-aos-anchor-placement="top-bottom" id="contents">Contents</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-new-yorker">From New Yorker</a></li>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-vox">From Vox</a></li>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-the-hindu-sports">From The Hindu: Sports</a></li>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-the-hindu-national-news">From The Hindu: National News</a></li>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-bbc-europe">From BBC: Europe</a></li>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-ars-technica">From Ars Technica</a></li>
|
||
<li><a href="#from-jokes-subreddit">From Jokes Subreddit</a></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-new-yorker">From New Yorker</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Dishonor, Trump’s and His Party’s, Is the Real January 6th Takeaway</strong> - Liz Cheney, defying the G.O.P., offered a searing indictment of the former President at Thursday’s hearing. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/letter-from-bidens-washington/dishonor-trumps-and-his-partys-is-the-real-january-6th-takeaway">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Why San Francisco Fired Chesa Boudin</strong> - Does the district attorney’s recall reveal the limitations of progressive criminal-justice reform? - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/the-political-scene/why-san-francisco-fired-chesa-boudin">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Hiding Buffalo’s History of Racism Behind a Cloak of Unity</strong> - Officials have described the recent shooting as an aberration in the “City of Good Neighbors.” But this conceals the city’s long-standing racial divisions. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/our-columnists/hiding-buffalos-history-of-racism-behind-a-cloak-of-unity">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>A Gun Scare at the Anti-Gun Rally</strong> - At the March for Our Lives, in Washington, D.C., a man yelled that he had a gun, sending attendees scrambling. For one local family, it was just more of the same. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/dispatch/a-gun-scare-at-the-anti-gun-rally">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>André Alexis Reads “Houyhnhnm”</strong> - The author reads his story from the June 20, 2022, issue of the magazine. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/podcast/the-writers-voice/andre-alexis-reads-houyhnhnm">link</a></p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-vox">From Vox</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li><strong>Finding a new job is possible — even when you’re burned out</strong> -
|
||
<figure>
|
||
<img alt="A cartoon illustration of a computer screen showing a person on a videoconference call." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/luYtphzSNQQmGLDgBcX49H0Dqpw=/250x0:2501x1688/1310x983/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/70970321/burnout.0.png"/>
|
||
<figcaption>
|
||
Shanée Benjamin for Vox
|
||
</figcaption>
|
||
</figure>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
Looking for a new job doesn’t have to be just another exhausting to-do list item.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="kAQZ1H">
|
||
It’s an ironic Catch-22: Your job is sapping your energy to the point where you can’t muster the strength to look for a new one. So what are you supposed to <em>do?</em>
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="t45DGK">
|
||
One of the most considerable issues with modern work is pervasive burnout. According to <a href="https://mpleiter.com/">Michael Leiter</a>, co-author of the upcoming book <a href="https://www.hup.harvard.edu/catalog.php?isbn=9780674251014"><em>The Burnout Challenge: Managing People’s Relationships With Their Jobs</em></a>, the core aspects of burnout are feeling exhausted, cynical, and discouraged. Last year, 71 percent of workers reported experiencing work-related stress, according to the American Psychological Association’s <a href="https://www.apa.org/pubs/reports/work-well-being/compounding-pressure-2021">2021 Work and Well-being Survey</a>. Three in five employees said they experienced negative impacts at work from stress; the top impacts reported were lack of interest, motivation, or energy; difficulty focusing; and lack of effort at work — all <a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/burnout/art-20046642">symptoms of burnout</a>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="ALnfrF">
|
||
Workplace burnout isn’t a byproduct of the pandemic; this specific breed of exhaustion predates it. The term <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/2158244017697154">first became popularized in the 1970s</a> to describe the exhaustion human services workers experienced. Over the ensuing decades, burnout has been shown to <a href="https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/1359432X.2021.1979962">exist in nearly every profession</a>, was <a href="https://www.who.int/news/item/28-05-2019-burn-out-an-occupational-phenomenon-international-classification-of-diseases">classified as an occupational phenomenon</a> by the World Health Organization, and was famously named a <a href="https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/21473579/millennials-great-recession-burnout-anne-helen-petersen">hallmark of the millennial generation</a>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="GNY0KB">
|
||
If your job is contributing — or is the sole contributor — to your burnout, you may feel pulled to search for greener pastures. But when you’re burned out, completing even the smallest of tasks, let alone a massive undertaking like a job search, can be daunting. “Looking for jobs is one of the hardest jobs there is,” Leiter says. “You’ve got to figure out how you’re going to put your energy together for that.” There are steps you can take to preserve your energy and look for your next role regardless of industry.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h3 id="ZIGl3m">
|
||
Get to the root of your burnout
|
||
</h3>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="2YGkWv">
|
||
Before jumping onto job boards, first determine <a href="https://hbr.org/2019/07/6-causes-of-burnout-and-how-to-avoid-them">what’s causing your burnout</a>, says workplace well-being expert <a href="https://www.jennifer-moss.com/">Jennifer Moss</a>, author of <a href="https://bookshop.org/books/the-burnout-epidemic-the-rise-of-chronic-stress-and-how-we-can-fix-it/9781647820367"><em>The Burnout Epidemic: The Rise of Chronic Stress and How We Can Fix It</em></a>. When you narrow in on why you’re so stressed, you can avoid entering another workplace culture that perpetuates the same issues. Is your workload too overwhelming, or so light you’re feeling bored and unfulfilled? Do you feel lonely and alienated from your colleagues? Are you being overlooked for promotions and raises? These topics are worth discussing with your current manager, Moss says, and can be addressed by fixes like limiting meetings, triaging important tasks, reconnecting with colleagues, having more control over your schedule, and fostering more communication with your manager (however, this will only be successful if your manager meets you halfway). Ideally, your boss will be receptive to your concerns and you won’t need to leave your job. “What are you looking for?” Moss says. “Because it isn’t going to be easy starting a brand new job, especially if you’re burned out.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="oOGntx">
|
||
Of course, if the workplace is truly toxic, you should feel empowered to quit. An <a href="https://sloanreview.mit.edu/article/why-every-leader-needs-to-worry-about-toxic-culture/">MIT Sloan Management Review analysis</a> of Glassdoor reviews found the top five descriptors of toxic workplaces were “disrespectful,” “non-inclusive,” “unethical,” “cutthroat,” and “abusive.” <a href="https://www.shrm.org/resourcesandtools/hr-topics/benefits/pages/shrm-study-greater-mental-health-challenges.aspx">Women</a>, <a href="https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamanetworkopen/fullarticle/2775738">LGBTQ people</a>, and <a href="https://www.eurekalert.org/news-releases/614959">people</a> <a href="https://utpjournals.press/doi/abs/10.3138/jehr-2021-0007">of</a> <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/00957984211033963">color</a> face systemic and structural issues in workplaces that further contribute to burnout. While quitting an unhealthy job without another offer is a privilege not everyone has, if your mental health is being seriously impacted, “we always have the option to leave,” Moss says.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h3 id="bESL9W">
|
||
Do some soul-searching
|
||
</h3>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="bZQ9cO">
|
||
If you’ve decided to find a new job, it’s helpful to determine what an ideal next position looks like for you in order to avoid getting overwhelmed by the deluge of job listings. To help workers envision their ideal working conditions, Leiter recommends reflecting on your current (or most recent, if you’re unemployed) workday for a week or so, making mental notes of the moments where you felt happy and fulfilled: What were you doing? Who were you working with? Who weren’t you working with?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="MJZBrR">
|
||
Then, Leiter says, think about the situations where you disliked the job: What were the most tedious moments? What overwhelmed you the most? What was the worst part of the day? What projects or situations gave you the Sunday scaries? “It could be just as simple as, ‘This job requires a lot of travel that takes me away from my family and I hate that,’” Leiter says. ”It could be, ‘People interrupt me all day. I hate it when people interrupt me.’”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="s5os9F">
|
||
Instead of looking for narrow skills or specifications in job listings, identify roles and companies that align with your values and well-being, Moss says. All of the factors initially contributing to your burnout can help guide you. For instance, if you’re burned out by isolation, you might want to look for a workplace with a hybrid approach so you can interact with colleagues face-to-face a few days a week. Or if your concern is with workload, perhaps a scrappy startup with a small team won’t be the best fit. “A lot of it is looking for mental health goals and priorities versus some of the other compensation factors that we might have looked for before,” Moss says.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h3 id="ZExGni">
|
||
Break down the job search
|
||
</h3>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="R0idtb">
|
||
The job search process can be long and arduous. Updating your resume, scouring job listings, writing cover letters, scheduling informational interviews, going on actual interviews, completing skills assessments, and then waiting patiently for updates is a lot even for people who aren’t burned out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<div class="c-float-right">
|
||
<aside id="5HNp06">
|
||
<q>“Looking for jobs is one of the hardest jobs there is”</q>
|
||
</aside>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Uxsifx">
|
||
Don’t be demoralized by the path to employment and instead break down the process into bite-size milestones: Give yourself 30-, 60-, and 90-day goals, says <a href="https://www.mindaharts.com/">Minda Harts</a>, workplace equity consultant and author of <a href="https://www.sealpress.com/titles/minda-harts/the-memo/9781580058452/"><em>The Memo: What Women of Color Need to Know to Secure a Seat at the Table</em></a>. During the first 30 days of your search, consider your values and what you’d like your next role to look like. Another 30-day goal is to <a href="https://www.themuse.com/advice/10-resume-resources-thatll-make-it-almost-impossible-for-a-hiring-manager-to-pass">work</a> on <a href="https://www.ziprecruiter.com/blog/resume-101-4-things-you-must-include/">your</a> <a href="https://www.resumebuilder.com/resume-examples/">resume</a>, Harts says, whether you’re devoting a few hours a week to sprucing it up (college and university career centers often have <a href="https://careercenter.umich.edu/article/resume-resources">free</a> <a href="https://career.berkeley.edu/Tools/Resume">resume</a> <a href="https://www.bc.edu/content/bc-web/offices/student-affairs/sites/careers/jobs-internships/resumes.html">writing</a> <a href="https://careers.umd.edu/find-jobs-internships/resumes-cover-letters/resume-how-to-guide">resources</a> <a href="https://career.virginia.edu/resumes">online</a>) or hiring a resume writer, if you can afford one. Sixty-day goals can include reaching out to folks who work in interesting positions or companies for short informational interviews. By 90 days, you should be applying for jobs. “I’m breaking it down, but I don’t feel overwhelmed,” Harts says. “I’m still able to heal during this process and get healthier because you want to be healthy while you’re job-seeking.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="rEqCDg">
|
||
While you’re taking on the extra burden of looking for a new job, you’re going to need to outsource some other tasks to create mental space. Harts suggests asking a partner or loved one if they can pick up the kids from day care a few times a week or take on extra chores around the house. You can also work with a <a href="https://hbr.org/2022/02/do-you-need-a-career-coach">career coach</a> who can make the ordeal feel less overwhelming and isolating. Again, working with an expert will come with a price tag — anywhere from <a href="https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/how-much-does-career-coaching-cost">$100 to $150 per session</a> — which not everyone can afford, but if you go that route, <a href="https://www.themuse.com/advice/how-to-choose-the-right-career-coach-for-you">look for people</a> with personality types you work well with and coaches with expertise in the field or industry where you’re looking to find a job.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="dNerXP">
|
||
Moss also recommends pairing applying for jobs with a pleasurable activity, like sipping a comforting cup of tea while firing off resumes. “You’re taking a moment to do something that engages those pleasure centers of your brain and then you’re doing something that feels like it’s productive,” she says. Don’t apply for jobs during work hours or on a company-issued laptop or phone, Moss continues, and don’t let applying eat too much into your personal time, either — just keep it to contained moments of the duration of your warm beverage or the time it takes the sun to set.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h2 id="lCJgGU">
|
||
Make the most of the interview
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Maw4ig">
|
||
Under ordinary circumstances, it’s crucial to come to the table prepared with questions for your interviewer — it’s your chance to figure out if the role and the company are a good fit, after all. When you’re dealing with burnout, it’s even more important to use the Q&A portion to ask pointed questions about culture. Without mentioning burnout outright, you can ask about office self-care practices, paid time off, flexible scheduling, and remote work. “You can get down to the question without actually coming out and saying, ‘Hey, are your employees experiencing burnout?’” Harts says. “You can position the burnout conversation around wellness.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="AZgz4P">
|
||
If your boss contributed to your burnout, you can ask about management style or team dynamics, Harts says. If the job listing mentioned flexible scheduling, ask what such flexibility looks like in practice. “Because maybe my last company’s flexibility was working five days a week in the office instead of seven,” Harts says, “so that’s not very flexible.” Moss recommends other sneaky questions worth asking to get to the root of burnout culture: “What are the company’s mental health benefits?” “How does the company build supportive working relationships?” “Tell me about the company’s employee resource groups.” “How are goals met? Are there individual or shared goals?” (Individual goals are more likely to lead to burnout, Moss says.)
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h2 id="DgiNa6">
|
||
Manage rejection
|
||
</h2>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="UPLRmr">
|
||
Rejection is, unfortunately, a requisite part of job searching. When you’re burned out and already contending with a defeatist attitude, rolling with the punches is much more difficult. Acknowledge the feelings of hurt and disappointment, Harts says. “Sometimes it’s easy for us to sweep them under the rug or we dwell on them too much,” she says, “which could create forms of impostor syndrome where we’re starting to gaslight ourselves about the situation.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="UGGHmy">
|
||
Then, acknowledge your limited control in the interview process and focus on the areas within your power, like which jobs you apply for and how prepared you are for each interview. “I can’t control if this company hires me or calls me back,” Harts says. “We have to remind ourselves, <em>What part of this equation can I control?</em> and I’m going to lean into that. I’m not going to allow myself to overwhelm myself additionally, or gaslight myself additionally by wondering if I’m good enough.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h3 id="zKbeYS">
|
||
Don’t bring burnout into your next role
|
||
</h3>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="0IOnA6">
|
||
Once you’ve landed a position, the last thing you want to do is bring burnout into your new job. Experts agree taking time off to recharge, log off, and rest is the best way to heal from burnout, so if you can afford to take a couple of weeks to invest in rest, you should. But many workers don’t have the option to forgo work for an extended period. In the absence of a transitory break, Leiter suggests partaking in a reenergizing activity — meditating, reading, spending time with friends — and reflecting on what excites you about work in the first place.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="uXhMtQ">
|
||
Harts also recommends having a conversation with your future manager to set boundaries, whether that’s determining how many days you’re able to come into the office, hours and days a week you’re able to work, flexibility when it comes to scheduling, or the after-hours email and chat expectations.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="FeIG1j">
|
||
The goal, Moss says, is to prioritize yourself instead of your work. The best-laid plan for plotting a job change while burned out is one with your needs and values at the center, orchestrated in small, but meaningful, steps.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="gvSqXq">
|
||
“After two years of facing our own mortality, our identity with work has really changed and our priorities have changed,” Moss says. “How important is work? Is it worth my health? Is it worth my happiness? If the answer is no, you want to think clearly about what the plan is to make that more of a priority.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="D1uGEM">
|
||
<a href="http://www.vox.com/even-better"><em>Even Better</em></a><em> is here to offer deeply sourced, actionable advice for helping you live a better life. Do you have a question on money and work; friends, family, and community; or personal growth and health? Send us your question by filling out this </em><a href="https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfiStGSlsWDBmglim7Dh1Y9Hy386rkeKGpfwF6BCjmgnZdqfQ/viewform"><em>form</em></a><em>. We might turn it into a story.</em>
|
||
</p></li>
|
||
<li><strong>What’s in the bipartisan plan for gun control</strong> -
|
||
<figure>
|
||
<img alt="March for our Lives holds D.C. event as lawmakers mull bipartisan gun control measures" src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/K3Nf5mJbdeOr4f9NPMMYqPVOPxw=/243x0:4126x2912/1310x983/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/70969216/1241255155.0.jpg"/>
|
||
<figcaption>
|
||
A recent March for our Lives event in Washington, D.C. illustrates the ongoing outrage over lawmakers’ lack of response to mass shootings. | Amanda Andrade-Rhoades via Getty Images
|
||
</figcaption>
|
||
</figure>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
The forthcoming bipartisan agreement could be the first new gun control laws enacted in decades.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="FRdAvU">
|
||
A bipartisan group of senators on Sunday <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2022/06/12/senate-gun-deal-framework/">announced a framework for federal gun control legislation</a>, a remarkable breakthrough after years of stasis and obstruction on the part of Republican senators to pass any restrictions on gun ownership. Despite the bipartisan cooperation, the framework is not yet formal legislation — and focuses primarily on mental health and school security interventions, rather than meaningfully restricting access to firearms.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="2lne0a">
|
||
The announcement comes after two horrific mass shootings: one at a grocery store in Buffalo, New York, which killed 10, and the other at an elementary school in <a href="https://www.vox.com/2022/6/12/23157849/teachers-school-shootings-uvalde-texas">Uvalde, Texas</a>, which killed 19 children. As mass-casualty events continue to mount, the country has seen a renewed demand for a significant response on the federal level. March for Our Lives, the gun control activism group founded after the deadly shooting in Parkland, Florida in 2018, <a href="https://www.cnn.com/2022/06/11/politics/march-for-our-lives-dc/index.html">held a rally in Washington, DC on Saturday</a>, calling for congressional action in the wake of the recent shootings.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="YrTrH0">
|
||
“The injustices we see on the daily are being blatantly ignored by those on Capitol Hill. The cries of the nation’s children can be heard across the world, and you choose to turn a blind eye and a deaf ear to the lives being taken,” March for our Lives board member Trevon Bosley said in a speech during Saturday’s rally, highlighting the lack of political will to pass federal gun control legislation even during the wake of the Parkland shootings, which killed 17. “Your job is to represent and serve all the people who call this country home, and so far you’ve shown us you only represent the pockets of whoever donates the most to your campaign,” Bosley said.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="BH7bkO">
|
||
Parkland survivor X González echoed that sentiment in an interview with <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2022/06/x-gonzalez-parkland-mass-shooting-gun-violence/661244/">the Atlantic</a> about their return to activism after the Buffalo and Uvalde shootings. “I definitely lay the blame on the naysayers within Congress who are against passing gun laws for any reason,” they told interviewer Elaine Godfrey. “They legitimately somehow believe that having guns will make people safer, which has <a href="https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/hsph-in-the-news/scientists-agree-guns-dont-make-society-safer/">statistically proven</a> over years and years and years to have especially negatively impacted children. Or they just don’t seem to care.” In 2020, the latest year for which there is data, <a href="https://wisqars.cdc.gov/data/explore-data/explore/selected-years?ex=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%3D">4,368 children 19 and under</a> were killed by firearms in the US, making <a href="https://www.axios.com/2022/05/26/gun-deaths-children-america">firearms the leading cause of death for this age group</a>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="ALxrdJ">
|
||
While the legislative framework introduced Sunday is nowhere near what activists and President Joe Biden are calling for, there is a sense that the announcement is the step in the right direction; as Gonzáles said in their Atlantic interview, “It’s definitely a start. We’ve got to begin somewhere.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h3 id="OM0w91">
|
||
The framework has a heavy focus on mental health and school interventions
|
||
</h3>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="1nTqKt">
|
||
Perhaps what is most surprising about the framework is that it exists at all, and that it’s the product of a bipartisan group of legislators — Sens. Chris Murphy (D-CT), Kyrsten Sinema (D-AZ), John Cornyn (R-TX), Thom Tillis (R-NC), are the lead negotiators on the framework, with a larger group including Sens. Susan Collins (R-ME), Chris Coons (D-DE), Martin Heinrich (D-NM), and Lindsey Graham (R-SC) also engaged in talks.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="BLvbOx">
|
||
The framework itself is heavy on mental health interventions, like setting aside funding for in-school mental health and support services, as well as telehealth services for individuals and families in mental health crisis. It also calls for a national expansion of community mental health services for children and families.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="3UOqwa">
|
||
Those measures echo some of the right-wing talking points that have historically emerged after past mass shooting incidents — that guns are not responsible for gun deaths, but instead, mental illness, the perceived lack of Christian influence on society, inadequate school security, and <a href="https://citationsneeded.libsyn.com/news-brief-rightwing-medias-increasingly-goofy-hyper-militarized-non-solutions-to-mass-shootings">a host of other social ills are to blame</a>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="C7S5w5">
|
||
While expanding access to and investment in mental health services is useful regardless of the reason, that alone can’t stop mass shootings. Nor can the proposed expansion of security measures in schools; although <a href="https://www.murphy.senate.gov/newsroom/press-releases/bipartisan-group-of-senators-announce-agreement">the framework</a> is thin on details, it suggests investing in “programs to help institute safety measures in and around primary and secondary schools, support school violence prevention efforts and provide training to school personnel and students.” Theoretically, that could mean increasing the number of police officers at schools — who, <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2022/06/09/us/uvalde-shooting-police-response.html">as reporting continues to show</a>, did not prevent the shooting at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, even as students called 911 from inside the school and parents tried to get in to help their children.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="W4YClv">
|
||
The framework also shows a strong focus on schools, though mass shootings can and do happen anywhere — grocery stores, concerts, and nightclubs included. “It’s frustrating to see people only reach out and care about things when it happens in school and to children,” González said in their <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2022/06/x-gonzalez-parkland-mass-shooting-gun-violence/661244/">Atlantic interview.</a> “They’re like, ‘This is especially heinous!’ Well, it’s equally heinous when it happens in a synagogue. It’s equally heinous when it happens in a Walmart. It’s equally heinous when it happens to one person on the street. And it’s all the fault of Congress.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<h3 id="oEPmxY">
|
||
How can we tease meaningful change out of the legislative framework?
|
||
</h3>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Fed2rj">
|
||
There is meaning to be found in the proposal, Although legislation is still in the draft phase and it’s not clear at all whether the final bill could even pass the highly divided Senate, the aspects of the framework that does address firearms could be significant.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="hEeYaq">
|
||
For example, state crisis intervention orders are already enacted in some states and, thus far, “don’t represent Second Amendment problems,” according to Ruben. ‘‘There are two lines of constitutional attack here. One would be the Second Amendment, the other would be the Due Process Clause,” he said, explaining that the crisis intervention orders, which allow a civil court to remove firearms or ammunition from people determined to be a danger to themselves or others, “require an initial showing to get a temporary removal order, and then it becomes final only after a hearing, where whoever is petitioning to have the firearms removed has to establish that the person presents a danger to themselves or others — and that person can challenge that effort in court during a hearing.” Expanding crisis intervention orders, then, could prove to be a meaningful, if incremental, step in gun control policy, and one that can withstand constitutional challenges.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="4ZSTLS">
|
||
Other elements of the framework, like closing the so-called “<a href="https://www.law.georgetown.edu/american-criminal-law-review/aclr-online/volume-55/closing-the-boyfriend-loophole-proposals-to-protect-dating-partners-from-gun-violence/">boyfriend loophole</a>,” could present big wins, too, according to Ruben. That loophole refers to the Lautenberg Amendment, which prevents some domestic violence offenders — but not all violent domestic partners — from owning firearms. Extending that provision to abusive domestic and dating partners who aren’t spouses could make massive inroads in preventing gun violence, especially violence against women. According to a 2020 study published in the <a href="http://jaapl.org/content/early/2020/02/05/JAAPL.003929-20">Journal of the American Academy of Psychiatry and the Law Online</a>, “when women are killed, they are more likely to be killed by an intimate partner than anyone else.” Research suggests a strong correlation between firearm use and intimate partner violence. Better definitions of domestic violence offenders would certainly serve to curb gun-related intimate partner homicides.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="QE21ar">
|
||
“One thing I will be interested to see, this enhanced background check for under-21 gun buyers… I’ll be really interested to see how that looks,” Ruben said. “The whole idea of the juvenile delinquency system is, these aren’t criminal proceedings, these find young people delinquent, we have a whole different lingo. But this one could be interesting, because in response to the Buffalo and Uvalde shootings, one thing that was notable was that those young men followed the law. They lawfully purchased the gun they purchased, and they bought them at 18.” Extending the background check period for under-21 gun buyers would actually provide adequate time for the <a href="https://rollcall.com/2019/10/10/charleston-mass-murderer-got-his-gun-because-of-background-check-gaps-internal-report-shows/">background checks</a> to be completed, since the current statute provides a three-day window for background checks. If nothing is flagged on a purchaser’s record within that timeframe, even if the background check is incomplete, <a href="https://giffords.org/lawcenter/gun-laws/policy-areas/background-checks/background-check-procedures/">a dealer is allowed to complete the sale</a>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="FjruaJ">
|
||
Despite the potential that the framework holds, there’s still the matter of finding 10 Republican senators who could provide a filibuster-proof majority and pass the resulting legislation, which is no small feat. Already, MAGA supporters in the House of Representatives are deriding the framework, falsely claiming that it impinges on Second Amendment rights and calling the Republican legislators working on it RINOs.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<div id="wL4t7n">
|
||
<blockquote class="twitter-tweet">
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" dir="ltr" lang="en">
|
||
MAGA reaction to today’s news of a bi-partisan compromise in the Senate for gun control bill. <a href="https://t.co/ZsnJ8gNM8Y">pic.twitter.com/ZsnJ8gNM8Y</a>
|
||
</p>
|
||
— Ron Filipkowski (<span class="citation" data-cites="RonFilipkowski">@RonFilipkowski</span>) <a href="https://twitter.com/RonFilipkowski/status/1536082129741815809?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">June 12, 2022</a>
|
||
</blockquote></div></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Mb7l4e">
|
||
The Senate also has limited time to draft and vote on the legislation before its two-week July recess — very little time, given the contentious nature of gun control legislation. But if it does happen, the House of Representatives — which <a href="https://apnews.com/article/congress-texas-buffalo-new-york-shootings-0d552cfe6c5a4fb8c83a151ea29d467f">already passed a broad gun control package</a> earlier in the week — <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2022/06/12/senate-gun-deal-framework/">will likely pass whatever is able to make it through the Senate</a>, marking some actual momentum to enact legislation that will curb gun violence and will save lives.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li><strong>The best $2,618 I ever spent: A second wedding ceremony</strong> -
|
||
<figure>
|
||
<img alt="An illustration of a wedding invitation atop its envelope." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/yjDB5rYLQzomQpo9kiVGnFM4PNs=/500x0:3500x2250/1310x983/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/70968250/Wedding.0.jpg"/>
|
||
<figcaption>
|
||
I was fiercely independent, and didn’t have faith I could care for anyone else. But Antoinette always believed in me. | Dana Rodriguez for Vox
|
||
</figcaption>
|
||
</figure>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
Six months after I nearly destroyed our first $26,112 day.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="8n5biw">
|
||
Four days after we walked down the aisle for the first time, my wife Antoinette and I cruised off on our honeymoon to Cozumel, Mexico. On our second night, we found ourselves sitting in a theater full of our fellow passengers as contestants on a knockoff version of the ’60s game show, <em>The Newlywed Game</em>.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="meNBrA">
|
||
The first question was easy — “Where was your first date?”— but they devolved quickly: Which in-law would you least like to be stuck on a deserted island with? Which movie best describes your love life? What is your husband’s most annoying habit?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="KHcCuG">
|
||
We got every question correct, and every answer was filled with resentment. Our first date was a 1930s diner outing at Quintessence, a Cap City landmark. We both deemed our love life to be akin to <em>Pee-wee’s Big Adventure</em>, and my wife offered three things she despised about me: how I wiped my nose with my finger, my nail munching, and how I was overall a neurotic nebbish.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="iPELiL">
|
||
We were suffering from the fallout of the past year: everything leading to what would be our first wedding ceremony. I didn’t deal well with change, and a wedding changes everything. It changes your family structure, changes how to organize finances. I was fiercely independent, and I didn’t have faith I could care for anyone else. But Antoinette always believed in me, and, somehow, every time I struggled with moving forward in our relationship, and every time I struggled with moving forward in life, Antoinette pushed me, and together we got through.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="JddSpp">
|
||
“Fill in the blank,” the Drew Carey-looking cruise director said to me. “The ugliest thing about my wife is ____.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="CxSwsI">
|
||
“Her tones,” I said, straight-faced. The host froze up, devoid of one-liners. We won, obviously.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<hr class="p-entry-hr" id="NcatkG"/>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="wFKEWk">
|
||
Antoinette and I met in April 2009, after the lead organizer of the mentoring program I volunteered for asked me to pick up the new mentor, a Brooklynite studying Africana studies and communications at SUNY Albany, speeding toward her bachelor’s in three years.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="co758N">
|
||
We cruised through the city in my blue Saturn as I fumbled over icebreakers: Where’re you from? What’re you studying?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="w2Oe8c">
|
||
Luckily for me, Antoinette was more skilled at the conversation thing. She dug through my CDs, pointing out that she also loved Maxwell and Amy Winehouse.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="onBwD4">
|
||
From then on, every week we drove around discussing race and religion and swapping book recommendations. I learned that, right before we met, Antoinette had left her ex-fiancé. To mark a new beginning, she pierced her nose and went in for the big chop, cutting off any chemically treated hair, and rocked an afro puff. I adored her positive energy, so when she mentioned she wanted to get her driver’s license, I volunteered my car for practice.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="LyEaOM">
|
||
We spent afternoons circling parking lots and gently bumping cars while parallel parking. When she scored her license, I came up with more excuses to hang out. After six months of being friends, she dropped the bomb, asking me via text: “Do you like me?” My hands shaking, I typed “yes.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<div class="c-float-right">
|
||
<aside id="Yliraw">
|
||
<q>I knew a life with Antoinette was what was best for me. I just feared it wasn’t best for her.</q>
|
||
</aside>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="2sFfrY">
|
||
Soon, I introduced her to my small, close-knit Ashkenazi Jewish family, and she welcomed me into her large but distant Nigerian and Jamaican crew. I loved how close she was to her mom, how she planned to have an intergenerational household. She appreciated how I was best friends/nearly twins with my little sister, how my big sister and her husband set my #couplegoals. Together we cooked salt fish latkes.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="g2QAKz">
|
||
When Antoinette and I met, I was 28 and three years sober. I had spent most of my early 20s dropping in and out of college, spending time behind the locked double doors of St. Peter’s Hospital detox unit, failing out of their rehab. In the first few years of my sobriety, I spent my days chilling on the stoop outside 12-step meetings on the corner of Lexington, working an entry-level respite position at a local social work agency.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="sTdnu1">
|
||
I liked my life in early recovery. I liked the room I rented in a two-bedroom on Morris St. Liked making meetings whenever I wanted. Liked volunteering to make myself feel good. My life felt safe. But four years after we started dating, Antoinette was tired of my inertia. She wanted marriage, a house, and a family (with seven kids, she used to joke).
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="RoVk8i">
|
||
As terrified of change as I was, I feared losing her more. I stalled for another year, but I finally popped the question over a bucket of seafood in a booth at our favorite Times Square eatery, Bubba Gump’s.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="M8EUKv">
|
||
Then I talked her into delaying the ceremony another year.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="BfM8cH">
|
||
I knew I loved and adored her, but I didn’t have faith in myself. I had never envisioned a future for me that involved anything more than hitting up meetings and remaining stagnant at the same social work agency. Starting a family felt unfathomable. During my hazy years, I stopped attempting to get sober because I figured I would just relapse. Once sober, I wouldn’t push myself to take any additional risks — whether it be a better job or a marriage — expecting that I’d mess everything up. Proposing was terrifying, but, beneath my distress, I knew a life with Antoinette was what was best for me. I just feared it wasn’t best for her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<hr class="p-entry-hr" id="smmRIx"/>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="GKnyH7">
|
||
I remember reading a study that said <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2014/10/the-divorce-proof-marriage/381401/">the more you spend on your wedding, the more likely it will end in divorce</a>. Every time Antoinette brought up ideas for venues, my mind spiraled. Neither of us made tons of money and neither was great at saving. To me, spending excessively on a wedding made no sense, but to Antoinette, money could always be made and was to be enjoyed. The tradition meant a lot to her so she wanted the perfect wedding ceremony, but, in truth, it probably meant more to me. A wedding made things absolute. I would either succeed at being a good partner forever or destroy her life. The more we spent, the more I felt the pressure mounting. Still, I pushed myself to brave forward with whatever Antoinette wished for.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="yxkmeI">
|
||
To afford the wedding, I focused on our day-to-day bills — rent, car insurance, internet, groceries — while Antoinette saved for the ceremony. We quickly put a deposit down on the fourth floor of the New York State Museum, claiming Antoinette’s dream location. The setting included a sick view of the Empire State Plaza and Capitol building. It was the perfect Albany landmark for a romance that bloomed across its streets.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Ezhn0D">
|
||
The wedding was scheduled for a Sunday because we kinda-sorta kept Shabbat, and I used the odd day as leverage to haggle down prices. We locked in Mallozzi’s, one of the capital’s ritziest caterers, as well as DJ Trumastr, Albany’s hottest DJ, who prepped a setlist consisting of Paul Simon, Lynxxx, and Beres Hammond, representing our diverse backgrounds. The affair came out to $26,112.86.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="YBGAQ0">
|
||
To be clear, we didn’t pay it all ourselves. Her dad handled the photographer and the balance for the venue, and her mom took care of the honeymoon and wedding dress, and she financed transportation for nearly her entire extended family (after the wedding, my parents gifted us a $10,000 check, to start our life together — that promptly went toward debt). The more our family invested in our stock, the more I panicked it would all go belly up.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<hr class="p-entry-hr" id="wMN0kw"/>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="sTfV8L">
|
||
Four months before our scheduled wedding date, my fears of failure turned catastrophic as my family fell into disarray.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="fupPLI">
|
||
Just weeks before my youngest sister’s wedding — which I already struggled with because it felt like our relationship was changing — my brother-in-law walked out on my older sister. He had been my role model, my biggest male influence. He gave me my first beer, taught me all his comedy routines. I told myself that if my big sister’s marriage went sour, my relationship with Antoinette would, too.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<div>
|
||
<aside id="CnnTQr">
|
||
<q>We posed for pictures, smiling before the carousel, but the emotions were staged</q>
|
||
</aside>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="HhU8mK">
|
||
I was unable to send the wedding invites. Every time I postponed, Antoinette grew more frustrated, to the point where we were sleeping in separate rooms. I broke up with her, three times, assuring myself she’d be better off without me, but she continued to talk me into staying. Two months before the ceremony, I dropped the invites into the mailbox, but the stabbing thoughts intensified. I had dreams of her happy with someone else, starting a family with a guy who wasn’t as mentally ill as I was. I had nightmares of us getting married, having kids, then me turning into my brother-in-law, leaving the family I loved to suffer the repercussions. A week before the ceremony, I broke up with her for the final time, promising myself I wouldn’t budge.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="1W6PyI">
|
||
Tears dampening her face, Antoinette smooshed her cheek into mine and whispered, “Just be with me for one day. Not all the future. Just a day.”
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="erZiDv">
|
||
At that moment, I decided to stay. To give it my best shot, just for that day. I tried to tell myself that I wasn’t my family, that I wasn’t the person I used to be. I decided I didn’t like myself at that moment, but I wanted to get better. I wanted to be the best person I could be, and the best person I could be was beside Antoinette, supporting her and celebrating her and growing with her.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="gsOT3g">
|
||
The day of the wedding, Antoinette half-expected I wouldn’t show. Even though we did the I-dos, she despised me for what I put her through, and I was frustrated with her for not having empathy during my crash. We threw the greatest party most of our guests had ever been to — impressing even my Nigerian ambassador father-in-law — but every kiss was strained. We posed for pictures, smiling before the carousel, but the emotions were staged. When we cruised off on our <em>Newlywed Game</em>-knockoff honeymoon, we were barely speaking.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<hr class="p-entry-hr" id="SvEYur"/>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="qcxTk2">
|
||
In the months that followed, we dedicated ourselves to couples therapy, determined to make our relationship work. We both realized that we struggled with communicating: Antoinette often shut down, while I turned overly emotional. We had to learn new ways to speak to each other. We focused on each other’s strengths, recognizing that we each brought something special to the table that the other lacked. I took responsibility for spiraling out of control, nearly ruining our wedding, and she worked to be empathetic to my anxiety. I realized how desperately I wanted her to attain her every dream and how blessed I was that she chose me to be her partner in achieving them; she believed in me, and I began to believe in me, too.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<div class="c-float-right">
|
||
<aside id="ZY4XEG">
|
||
<q>We weren’t trying to show off — we just wanted to feed friends and family yummy food and spin in circles of joy</q>
|
||
</aside>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="LRNCSY">
|
||
For over a year, Antoinette had been meeting with our rabbi, taking classes, attending shul, moving toward converting to Judaism. We had always planned to have a second, intimate religious wedding after she formally converted. And so six months after the first wedding, my wife dunked herself into the mikvah, a ritual bath, completing the process, and we held a small ceremony in our Albany temple, costing $2,618: enough to rent the social hall, hire a klezmer band, contract a videographer, borrow a chuppah, and buy a crap ton of lox, bagels, and kugel.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="sQ38DW">
|
||
The first wedding, we were trying to impress people, but this second wedding, we weren’t trying to show off — we just wanted to feed friends and family yummy food and spin in circles of joy. We didn’t even send invites. Instead, we handed out flyers and plastered them online, keeping the ceremony open to anyone who wanted to join.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="zZyVXa">
|
||
I took pride in planning and paying for the second ceremony myself. Though the event was much cheaper, I didn’t settle for anything. The food was on point. So were our outfits. It felt like victory that every dollar spent was my own — I was investing in our future.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="S118m3">
|
||
Under the chuppah, I crunched the glass and we jumped the broom. When we leaped, we did it together. The community lifted us aloft in chairs, and, as we floated above the crowd, each grasping the napkin connecting us, I realized I could do it. I could handle life’s changes. I could grow. My wife had been with me when I was at my lowest. I knew I’d do the same for her. We’d survived one of our toughest hurdles, and I had faith we could get through more. I was ready. Ready to create a home, ready to start a family, with faith, with Antoinette.
|
||
</p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-the-hindu-sports">From The Hindu: Sports</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>India qualify for FIFAe Nations Series 2022</strong> - India defeated Korea Republic and Malaysia in the FIFAe Nations Series 2022 playoffs to seal their qualification</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Back home: Erling Haaland completes move to Man City from Borussia Dortmund</strong> -</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Floyd Mayweather Jr. touched by Hall of Fame induction</strong> - Floyd Mayweather Jr. was inducted into the International Boxing Hall of Fame in a ceremony that included the past three classes</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Shadab gives Pakistan ODI series sweep against West Indies</strong> - The series win lifted Pakistan to No. 4 on the points table — immediately above West Indies — in the ICC Cricket World Cup Super League</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Shane Warne honoured posthumously, Ash Barty awarded in Queen's birthday list</strong> -</p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-the-hindu-national-news">From The Hindu: National News</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Swapna Suresh moves Kerala High Court to quash criminal case</strong> - Revelation of statement in public not illegal, she contends</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Tension prevails at Gudatipally</strong> - Police force enter village in the wee hours</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Sixty nine illegally constructed houses inside Manipur forest demolished</strong> - Senior officials of the district administration and Forest Department were present when the houses were demolished.</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Scheme to reduce food wastage launched in Tiruvallur</strong> - Ma. Subramanian inaugurates ‘Food Festival 2022’ in the district</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Compensation paid to all, except a few: Husnabad RDO</strong> -</p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-bbc-europe">From BBC: Europe</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Ukraine war: Former British soldier Jordan Gatley killed in fighting</strong> - Jordan Gatley was killed as Ukrainian forces fought for control of Severodonetsk, his family said.</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>French election: Left surge threatens Macron majority in France</strong> - A strong showing by a left-green alliance jeopardises the French president’s parliamentary majority.</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Have a look inside Russia’s new ‘Tasty’ McDonald’s replacement</strong> - The new Russian brand is called “Vkusno i Tochka”, which translates to “Tasty and that’s it”.</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Azerbaijan Grand Prix: Max Verstappen wins in Baku as Charles Leclerc retires</strong> - Max Verstappen wins the Azerbaijan Grand Prix and takes control of the World Championship after an engine failure on Charles Leclerc’s Ferrari.</p></li>
|
||
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Russia hands out passports in occupied Ukraine cities</strong> - The issuing of Russian passports in occupied Kherson and Melitopol is condemned by Kyiv.</p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-ars-technica">From Ars Technica</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Credentials for thousands of open source projects free for the taking—again!</strong> - Leak of credentials can be used in massive supply-chain attacks. - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1860268">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Starfield gameplay premiere resembles “No Man’s Skyrim,” leads Xbox showcase</strong> - <em>Forza Motorsport</em> stands out as a current-gen stunner. But what about today’s no-shows? - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1860390">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Why can’t we remember being born or our first words?</strong> - What scientists know about “infantile amnesia.” - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1860244">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>NASA’s plan to get Ingenuity through the Martian winter</strong> - NASA engineers are trying to overcome colder nights and frequent dust storms. - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1860133">link</a></p></li>
|
||
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>The weekend’s best deals: Apple Music subscriptions, Sony headphones, and more</strong> - Dealmaster also includes Sonos speakers, lots of video games, and the Google Chromecast. - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1860239">link</a></p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-jokes-subreddit">From Jokes Subreddit</h1>
|
||
<ul>
|
||
<li><strong>The wage gap isn’t real.</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF -->
|
||
<div class="md">
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
Men simply focus on getting the higher paying jobs like scientist, doctor, engineer. Meanwhile, women tend to go towards the lower paying jobs, like female scientist, female doctor and female engineer.
|
||
</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<!-- SC_ON -->
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/LeBoi124"> /u/LeBoi124 </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vb388z/the_wage_gap_isnt_real/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vb388z/the_wage_gap_isnt_real/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
|
||
<li><strong>A man walks in a bar and sees a jar full of 100$ bills</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF -->
|
||
<div class="md">
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
A man walks in a bar and sees a jar full of $100 bills, so he asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
The bartender replies that it is a bet and you have to pay $100 to partecipate. The bet consists in three tests:
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
The first test: You see that man sitting back there? His name is Big Jim, he stands 6’5 feet tall (2 meters) and weighs 551 pounds (250 Kilograms), you have to knock him out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
The second test: If you pass the first test, you have to get out of the bar, where there’s Big Jim’s dog. You have to remove a tooth from it.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
The third test: If you pass the second test, you have to go on the second floor where there’s Big Jim’s mom, an 85 years old woman who never reached an orgasm. You have to fuck her like you have never done before.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
If you pass the three tests all the money in the jar will be yours, but I warn you, no one has ever managed to win the bet.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
At this point the man gives up and orders the bartender to give him some whisky. After “a few drinks”, the man, completely drunk, says: “fuck you, I will take the bet!” and puts $100 on the bar counter.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
Staggering, he walks over to Big Jim and kicks him in the balls, knocking him out.
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
He remembers the second test, gets out of the bar and face Big Jim’s dog. At first the dog started to growl, then it starts to howl, and then silence…
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
A few seconds later the man returns to the bar and asks the bartender:
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
“AND NOW WHERE IS THE OLD WOMAN WHOSE TOOTH I HAVE TO REMOVE?”
|
||
</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<!-- SC_ON -->
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/XChri"> /u/XChri </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vang2g/a_man_walks_in_a_bar_and_sees_a_jar_full_of_100/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vang2g/a_man_walks_in_a_bar_and_sees_a_jar_full_of_100/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
|
||
<li><strong>A Hunter</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF -->
|
||
<div class="md">
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
A man goes hunting and runs into a bear. He takes dead aim and fires. When the smoke clears, he sees no bear. The bear taps him on the shoulder and says: bend over or I eat you. The next year, the hunter brings a bear gun, sees the very same bear, takes dead aim and fires. When the smoke clears, the hunter is in shock to find no bear. Tap on shoulder: bend over or I eat you. The next year, the hunter arrives with a bazooka. He sees the bear, takes dead aim and fires. Rocks and earth reign down, the smoke clears and no bear. The bear taps him on the shoulder and says: you don’t come here for the hunting do you?
|
||
</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<!-- SC_ON -->
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Boxwood50"> /u/Boxwood50 </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vax2s2/a_hunter/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vax2s2/a_hunter/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
|
||
<li><strong>I asked my boss for a raise.</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF -->
|
||
<div class="md">
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
He said what for?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
I told him 3 different companies are after me. He asked which ones?
|
||
</p>
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
I said: Gas, Water, and Electric.
|
||
</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<!-- SC_ON -->
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/drewfussss"> /u/drewfussss </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vam29r/i_asked_my_boss_for_a_raise/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vam29r/i_asked_my_boss_for_a_raise/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
|
||
<li><strong>From my eight year old daughter: What is the strongest bird?</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF -->
|
||
<div class="md">
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
|
||
A crane.
|
||
</p>
|
||
</div>
|
||
<!-- SC_ON -->
|
||
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/hadrian217"> /u/hadrian217 </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vawnbs/from_my_eight_year_old_daughter_what_is_the/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/vawnbs/from_my_eight_year_old_daughter_what_is_the/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
|
||
</ul>
|
||
|
||
|
||
<script>AOS.init();</script></body></html> |