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<h1 data-aos="fade-down" id="daily-dose">Daily-Dose</h1>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" data-aos-anchor-placement="top-bottom" id="contents">Contents</h1>
<ul>
<li><a href="#from-new-yorker">From New Yorker</a></li>
<li><a href="#from-vox">From Vox</a></li>
<li><a href="#from-the-hindu-sports">From The Hindu: Sports</a></li>
<li><a href="#from-the-hindu-national-news">From The Hindu: National News</a></li>
<li><a href="#from-bbc-europe">From BBC: Europe</a></li>
<li><a href="#from-ars-technica">From Ars Technica</a></li>
<li><a href="#from-jokes-subreddit">From Jokes Subreddit</a></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-new-yorker">From New Yorker</h1>
<ul>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>The Investigations of Joe Biden Begin</strong> - A new Republican House subcommittee and a new special counsel pose more of a political threat to the President than a legal one. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/daily-comment/the-investigations-of-joe-biden-begin">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>A Message for the Federal Reserve in the New Inflation Data</strong> - As a new report shows price pressures easing, should the central bank rethink its strategy of raising interest rates? - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/our-columnists/a-message-for-the-federal-reserve-in-the-new-inflation-data">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Californias Devastating Storms Are a Glimpse of the Future</strong> - Even as the state weathers a megadrought, climate change is increasing the risk of catastrophic floods. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/annals-of-a-warming-planet/californias-devastating-storms-are-a-glimpse-of-the-future">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>What to Do When It Rains on the Winter Games</strong> - Governor Kathy Hochuls ambitious climate plan for New York. - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/news/daily-comment/what-to-do-when-it-rains-on-the-winter-games">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>In Politics, How Old Is Too Old?</strong> - If youre running for President, is age really “just a number”? Jane Mayer, Jill Lepore, and a gerontologist discuss how old is too old. Plus, Deepti Kapoor on her novel “Age of Vice.” - <a href="https://www.newyorker.com/podcast/the-new-yorker-radio-hour/in-politics-how-old-is-too-old">link</a></p></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-vox">From Vox</h1>
<ul>
<li><strong>Nomas closing exposes the contradictions of fine dining</strong> -
<figure>
<img alt="Rene Redzepi stands in a doorway, wearing an apron and crossing his arms." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/ERJIHzvb6ClJVLeY5zqeRZ44ZcU=/193x0:3196x2252/1310x983/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/71864887/GettyImages_1233638359a.0.jpg"/>
<figcaption>
Rene Redzepi, chef and co-owner of the world-class Danish restaurant Noma, in Copenhagen, Denmark, on May 31, 2021. Redzepi recently announced he would close the restaurant at the end of 2024. | Thibault Savary/AFP via Getty Images
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Noma, no more.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="l0JjDD">
Its been a bad century for what we used to call high culture. Even before a dramatic pandemic-driven <a href="https://trgarts.com/blog/insights-report-march-2022">drop in attendance</a> for live theater, opera, symphonies, dance, and art exhibitions, the percentage of Americans who were taking in live cultural events over the past two decades <a href="https://www.arts.gov/sites/default/files/2017-sppapreviewREV-sept2018.pdf">had been dwindling</a>. Classical music sales have been <a href="http://culture.affinitymagazine.us/is-classical-music-on-the-decline/#:~:text=Statistics%20indicate%20that%20classical%20music,in%20the%20U.S.%20were%20classical.">in a long-term slide</a>, orchestras have been <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/music/people-are-upset-when-an-orchestra-closes-if-only-they-went-to-the-concerts/2019/07/19/67b2d188-a983-11e9-9214-246e594de5d5_story.html">closing around the country</a>, masters of fine arts programs <a href="https://www.insidehighered.com/news/2022/04/29/study-humanities-graduate-education-shrinking">are declining</a>, book review sections <a href="https://www.insidehighered.com/blogs/higher-ed-gamma/decline-book-review">are shrinking</a>, and poetry, according to the New York Times, <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2022/12/29/opinion/eliot-waste-land-poetry.html">has apparently been dead for 100 years</a>.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="KGTPdc">
But theres one exception: high-end dining.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="encjUs">
The past 20 years have witnessed a supernova of haute cuisine, an explosion of tasting menus and chefs tables. The best restaurants have gone from the background to the foreground of the cosmopolitan experience, becoming travel destinations in their own right. Top chefs — and yes, I <a href="https://www.bravotv.com/top-chef">know the reference</a> — are more than mere celebrities; theyre cultural figures. Its as though we took all the energy we once devoted to the production and appreciation of art in all its forms, put it on a plate, and eagerly lapped it up.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="07hZZC">
No one place better symbolizes that new cultural order better than the internationally famous Copenhagen restaurant Noma. Nomas accolades have no end — in August 2021 it earned its <a href="https://www.reuters.com/lifestyle/noma-reinvent-michelin-starred-restaurant-new-food-lab-2023-01-09/">third Michelin star</a>, and it has <a href="https://www.en-vols.com/en/taste/restaurants-en/noma-best-restaurant-world-closing/">topped</a> the Worlds 50 Best Restaurant list five times. But if anything, those awards understate Nomas influence on the food world. As the New York Times food critic Pete Wells <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/09/dining/rene-redzepi-closing-noma-pete-wells.html">wrote this past week</a>, no other restaurant “came up with so many ideas that were shoplifted by so many other places in so many other cities quite so quickly.”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="rr0htm">
And thats why it was so surprising, and so meaningful, when the news broke earlier this week that chef Rene Redzepi would <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/09/dining/noma-closing-rene-redzepi.html">close down Noma</a> as a restaurant at the end of 2024. The pressure of producing innovative cuisine on a daily basis, of reinventing his menu again and again, and of doing all of that while fairly compensating a staff of nearly 100 people, was simply not possible.
</p>
<div class="p-fullbleed-block">
<div class="c-image-grid">
<div class="c-image-grid__item">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/5kMwxH7uAZN8-XnAScJByY8HXiw=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24358123/GettyImages_1233638424a.jpg"/> <cite>Thibault Savary/AFP via Getty Images</cite>
<figcaption>
Rene Redzepi, center, works with staff in Nomas kitchen.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
<div class="c-image-grid__item">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/PZ8dGGZ8pDaB1LlQU58JxkfdvvY=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24358058/GettyImages_1233638792a.jpg"/> <cite>Thibault Savary/AFP via Getty Images</cite>
<figcaption>
The dining room at Noma in May 2021.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="NRbSWd">
“It is unsustainable,” he <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/09/dining/noma-closing-rene-redzepi.html">told Julia Moskin of the New York Times</a>. “Financially and emotionally, as an employer and as a human being, it just doesnt work.”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="LBJyeI">
Its only apt that Redzepi, who oversaw plates at Noma as perfect as a painting, would have the perfect finishing touch to this golden era of fine dining: “It just doesnt work.” Or, to put it in a way that Marxists would appreciate: It collapsed under its own contradictions.
</p>
<h3 id="DMH4gi">
The era of haute cuisine as high culture, explained
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="d7Yekm">
Looking back, the high point of high chef culture came in the mid-2010s, with the Netflix documentary series <em>Chefs Table</em>. Created by David Gelb in the mold of his 2011 hit documentary <em>Jiro Dreams of Sushi</em>, each episode focused on a single chef with the same monomaniacal obsession, the same faultless art direction, that those chefs brought to the art of their food.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="m5hMm5">
Here was Dan Barber of New Yorks Blue Hill at Stone Barns running through the bucolic hills of Westchester County, dreaming of how to divide a menu by the seasons. Here was Magnus Nilsson of Swedens Fäviken hunting through the Nordic forest for the local ingredients that would furnish his menu. The filming was lavish, complete with slow-motion sequences of chefs sprinkling seasoning on a dish (or, in the case of Patagonia barbecue master Francis Mallmann, grilling a full carcass on an open flame) as if they were Jackson Pollock putting the last drips <a href="https://thehundreds.com/blogs/content/five-iconic-paintings-jackson-pollock">on <em>No. 5</em></a>. In the final shots, their signature dishes were presented to the viewer as literal works of art.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="q2klyB">
There were two takeaways from <em>Chefs Table</em>. One, these guys — and, especially in the early seasons, it was mostly guys — take food really, really seriously. What you and I might think of as dinner is for them a way of life. And two, taking food this seriously requires untold sacrifice — of time, of money, of any vestige of a normal life. As Eater writer Joshua David Stein <a href="https://www.eater.com/2015/4/30/8517359/chefs-table-netflix-barber-bottura-nilssen">put it</a> in an early review of <em>Chefs Table</em>, its “Trauma X + Challenge Y = Triumph Z.” The diner may pay for the meal — quite a lot — but the chef, like a true artist, suffers for it.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="GowtgI">
My own culinary abilities max out at roast salmon, but Ive been to enough <a href="https://www.elevenmadisonpark.com/">Eleven Madisons</a> and <a href="https://nymag.com/listings/restaurant/blue-hill/">Blue Hills</a> to know that food in its most rarefied form has every right to claim the mantle of art. But the question remains: Why this art form, at this moment?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="HSeYrG">
Some of this stems from the simple fact that the 2000s and 2010s were a golden age for fine cuisine, a moment when food took a quantum leap in quality and creativity. This happens, from time to time, in every art form — the 1950s for painting, for instance, or the 1970s for cinema. A new approach emerges, a decisive break with the past, and a fresh group of practitioners arise to push the boundaries of their form — and each other. In food, that came from the discovery (or often rediscovery) of fresh, local ingredients; from the momentum of globalization that allowed chefs to mix and match culinary traditions from around the world; from the rise of food critics who could taste the shock of the new.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="tkKdVy">
But there were other factors at play that intersected with larger cultural, economic, and political trends. As environmental concerns rose, food became a way to fight back, for chefs to signal that cooking and eating the right way — their way — could be part of the solution. The unequal economic growth of the past several decades created a large enough group of potential diners willing and eager to seek out and spend hundreds of dollars per person at the worlds top restaurants. And, most important of all, knowledge of fine food became a clear mark of cultural status, even down to carefully illustrated cookbooks adorning your shelves.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Y5ARTS">
All of which gave chefs enormous cultural cachet, and put enormous weight on them and their profession — weight, as Redzepis experience shows, that was ultimately unbearable.
</p>
<h3 id="xG0yAy">
The end of fine dining?
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="M2ZkiO">
What does it feel like to be at the center of a white-hot moment for your profession, to have surpassed all the wildest dreams you might have had as a 19-year-old <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2010/nov/06/rene-redzepi-noma-restaurant">toiling in a French kitchen in Montpellier?</a> If you go by Redzepis own words: pretty bad, often!
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="meKB6w">
“I had my own restaurant, with my own money invested, with the weight of all the expectation in the world,” Redzepi <a href="https://madfeed.co/2015/culture-of-the-kitchen-rene-redzepi/">wrote in a 2015 essay</a> for the food magazine Lucky Peach. “And within a few months I started to feel something rumbling inside of me. I could feel it bubbling, bubbling, bubbling. And then one day the lid came flying off. The smallest transgressions sent me into an absolute rage.” He realized that if the culture of the high-end kitchen didnt change, “were on course to really mess things up.”
</p>
<div class="c-wide-block">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/sRsXuFgQKqvSb8ginLRcjH9NH-s=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24358071/GettyImages_1233638640a.jpg"/> <cite>Thibault Savary/AFP via Getty Images</cite>
<figcaption>
Noma staff prep food in May 2021.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="liNPa3">
Redzepis confessions came as the food world was just starting to come to grips with the toxic working conditions that went into the making of beautiful food. Me Too exposés on chefs and restaurateurs like <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2022/08/24/dining/mario-batali-sexual-misconduct-lawsuits-settles.html#:~:text=Batali%2C%20who%20once%20sat%20atop,one%20to%20face%20criminal%20charges.">Mario Batali</a> and <a href="https://www.eater.com/2019/12/5/20974733/metoo-restaurant-industry-recap-2019">Ken Friedman</a> opened up into a broader conversation about labor abuses in pressure-cooker kitchens — both the extreme versions and, more importantly, those that had long been considered standard operating practice. (Heres the first line of Redzepis essay: “I started cooking in a time when it was <em>common </em>[emphasis mine] to see my fellow cooks get slapped across the face for making simple mistakes, to see plates fly across a room, crashing into someone who was doing his job too slowly.”) At Noma, as at many other world-class restaurants, <a href="https://www.ft.com/content/a62a96b8-2db2-44ec-ac80-67fcf83d86ef">much of the kitchen</a> was staffed by what are called stagiaires<em> </em>— essentially, interns on short-term contracts, working back-breaking hours not for pay but for the experience of learning at the feet of the chef.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="smvgJl">
So thats unbearable contradiction No. 1: Behind the image of the faultless food and the rhetoric about the <a href="https://www.delightedcooking.com/in-the-restaurant-industry-what-is-a-family-meal.htm">staff as a “family”</a> was a whole lot of ugliness and toxic power dynamics. (And thats not even getting into the food worlds <a href="https://spoonuniversity.com/lifestyle/the-fine-line-between-culinary-appropriation-and-appreciation">ongoing controversy</a> over cultural appropriation.) We may not have wanted to see how the sausage was made, but once we had, it was impossible to look at our meals the same way again.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="5WIpcz">
And when restaurants like Noma tried to rectify some of these problems — in October, Noma <a href="https://news.yahoo.com/former-noma-intern-500-person-172015701.html">began paying its interns</a>, adding some $50,000 a month to its labor costs — they ran into the very real fact that even the priciest and most exclusive spots in the world are not immune to a basic economic fact: Even in good times, restaurants are a <a href="https://www.synergysuite.com/blog/average-restaurant-profit-margin/">really shitty business</a>. Thats why the closure of Noma signified to so many “a flashing warning sign for the end of global fine dining,” Dana Cowin, a former editor-in-chief of Food &amp; Wine, <a href="https://www.bonappetit.com/story/noma-closing-reactions">told Bon Appétit</a>. “If Redzepi cant make it sustainable, who can?”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="dbQ8yC">
And theres contradiction No. 2: sustainability. Global fine dining over the past two decades was increasingly built on the idea of not just quality but sustainability — environmental sustainability, social sustainability. The revelations of precisely how these kitchens were run put the lie to the second part, but theres still a lingering sense that, through the judicious use of organic and local ingredients, through a commitment to ethical sourcing, through exhaustively detailed tableside sermons by your server, high-end, highly expensive restaurants could somehow also be sustainable, in the other green sense.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="E2VYys">
Heres the problem: This is totally ridiculous.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Ux3Ook">
Lets start with the bill. If you are eating a meal that costs you $500 or more per person — a little less than a fifth of the annual <a href="https://ourworldindata.org/grapher/daily-median-income?tab=chart&amp;country=OWID_WRL~ESP~KOR~MDG">global median household income</a> — then by definition you are not engaged in an activity that could be considered sustainable on a global level. Shocking, I know.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Y4AiCu">
And then theres the question of local — when it comes to measures like CO2 emissions, the <a href="https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/23132579/eat-local-csa-farmers-markets-locavore-slow-food">distance your food travels</a> is relatively minor compared to what<em> </em>youre eating: chicken versus beef versus vegetables versus grains. Eating local feels good, and often tastes good, but we are not going to save the Earth that way, and we shouldnt fool ourselves that we will. Attempts to actually live up to that creed end up flailing in futility, like when New Yorks Eleven Madison Park went all vegan, only to dash itself against the rocks of <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/09/28/dining/eleven-madison-park-restaurant-review-plant-based.html">bad reviews</a>, <a href="https://www.bonappetit.com/story/eleven-madison-park-vegan-menu">labor issues</a>, and accusations of hypocrisy when it turned out there was a <a href="https://pagesix.com/2021/09/29/vegan-eleven-madison-park-offers-secret-meat-menu-for-the-rich/">secret menu of meat-based dishes for the elite</a>.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="D5lqDE">
Then theres the fact that the global class of fine-dining restaurants can only exist because of, well, globalization. Four Copenhagen restaurants were on <a href="https://www.theworlds50best.com/stories/News/the-worlds-50-best-restaurants-2022-the-list-in-pictures.html">2022s Worlds 50 Best Restaurant list</a> — not even including Noma, which was <a href="https://www.tastingtable.com/933013/why-noma-couldnt-win-the-award-for-2022s-worlds-50-best-restaurant/">ineligible</a> because of its previous wins — and it hosts dozens of Michelin-starred restaurants. All of this in a city with a <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2019/03/25/climate/copenhagen-climate-change.html">core population</a> of fewer than 700,000 people. Just as there wouldnt be enough people with incomes large enough to keep Noma and its Danish peers going without the effects of globalization and economic growth — with all the impact that has had on the environment — there wouldnt be enough customers period <a href="https://www.townandcountrymag.com/leisure/dining/a39251032/europe-best-restaurants-news/">without all those flights</a> bringing culinary tourists to Copenhagen.
</p>
<div class="c-wide-block">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/pi15yQx67896HnCT3fcjXBgzvSg=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24358093/GettyImages_1233638380a.jpg"/> <cite>Thibault Savary/AFP via Getty Images</cite>
<figcaption>
Noma in May 2021.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="p0CiUe">
Really, what did we expect? As the Finnish chef Kim Mikkola, a Noma alumnus, <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/09/dining/noma-closing-rene-redzepi.html">told the Times</a>, “Everything luxetarian is built on someones back; somebody has to pay.” The diner presented with the bill, the staff toiling in the back kitchen, the chef pressed on all corners, the Earth — at Noma or any restaurant of its ilk, there is no such thing as a free lunch, as Redzepi has surely discovered.
</p>
<h3 id="07uDtU">
No, chef
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Wc59Jc">
So what exactly do we want from haute cuisine? Is it to demonstrate that food can be not just good but better — better for us and the planet? Is it to show you can make perfect food with perfect service in the perfect environment, night after night, while treating each and every one of the many workers required to make that possible as fairly as possible? Or is to turn a restaurant into a canvas of creativity, a white space — or, in the case of Noma, cool Scandinavian gray and wood-tan — for an ambitious, driven chef to produce the best possible art they can?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="yD2ZP8">
Pick one, because you cant have them all.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="TEBb1Z">
High-end, experimental cuisine like that found at Noma is unnecessary, in the same way every form of art is unnecessary — unnecessary for everything except what it means to be human. Food was our art of the moment because for a moment, it seemed in sync with everything we demanded: environmental sustainability, the old reclaimed and remade in the fashion of a superior new, and perhaps most of all, the ability through the multiplier of social media that you came, you saw, and you ate. At a time when digital media had made almost every other form of art instantly available and therefore instantly valueless, being at Noma meant you could pay for your ticket.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="ZnEp8g">
And so Noma the restaurant will become a lab for <a href="https://nomaprojects.com/">Noma Projects</a>, which sounds like something that should be funded by the worst Silicon Valley VC you can imagine, and other fine-dining chefs, like Kim Mikkola, will go on to <a href="https://www.distractify.com/p/somebody-feed-phil-season-5-locations">elevated fried chicken shops</a> and the like.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="JWrqBB">
Which is fine — the world could always use better fried chicken. But well lose something along the way, that special thing that can only be the product of one ambitious persons singular, uncompromising vision, something for which theyre willing to sacrifice everything and everyone in their way, including themselves. That thing is art, in all its glorious, bloody, brilliant, and awful contradictions.
</p></li>
<li><strong>Our debt ceiling crisis could hit as early as June. Heres how Biden can sidestep it.</strong> -
<figure>
<img alt="A protester at the US Capitol building holds a hand-lettered sign over their head that reads “Stop the default.” " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/XX3-3oItMnWqC8pBojclIcxt-ac=/309x143:3580x2596/1310x983/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/71847365/GettyImages_184774992a.0.jpg"/>
<figcaption>
Protesters rally at the US Capitol in 2013, urging Congress to end the government shutdown and avert the debt limit crisis. House Speaker Kevin McCarthy got his job by promising GOP holdouts a fight on raising the debt ceiling again this year. | Bill Clark/CQ Roll Call
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Joe Biden can use executive power to defuse the debt ceiling bomb, but that comes with risks of its own.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="oGY6f0">
On Friday, Treasury Secretary Janet Yellen <a href="https://home.treasury.gov/news/press-releases/jy1188">sent a note</a> to congressional leadership with a message that you do not want to hear from the official charged with running Americas finances: Because of yet another fight over raising the nations statutory debt limit, the Treasury Department would need to begin using “extraordinary measures” to keep paying the countrys bills. If lawmakers did not act to raise the ceiling, those measures could be exhausted by early June, leaving the US in a state of default.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="y2VU4A">
The ceiling, a legal limit on how much outstanding debt the federal government can hold, sparked standoffs between the Democratic White House and Senate and the GOP House in 2011, and again in 2013, and is now set to unfold yet again. The Republican House rebels who voted against Kevin McCarthy in the speaker election over a dozen times finally forced a <a href="https://twitter.com/susanferrechio/status/1611448016367394825">promise to never pass a “clean” debt ceiling increase</a> (that is, one without spending cuts attached) in exchange for their votes. On Monday, the majority <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/05/us/politics/house-rules-package.html">adopted new rules</a> that will make it more difficult to increase the debt limit and make it easier for Republicans to insist that raising the ceiling will need to come with spending cuts.<strong> </strong>
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Za9hzs">
Breaching the ceiling and violating what Yellen called the “full faith and credit of the United States” would be almost incomprehensibly bad. <a href="https://www.spglobal.com/en/research-insights/articles/with-a-us-government-shutdown-there-will-be-blood">Beth Ann Bovino, chief US economist at Standard and Poors</a>, was hardly alone in 2017 when she predicted that “the impact of a default by the U.S. government on its debts would be worse than the collapse of Lehman Brothers in 2008, devastating markets and the economy.”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="og0rHN">
And yet America keeps running this apocalyptic Groundhog Day, one that, thanks to Yellens letter, now comes with a countdown clock. Luckily, there is a way out of the dilemma: ending the debt ceiling once and for all. The best way to do this is through legislation, but given the stranglehold of Republican hardliners in the House, that looks impossible. The administration couldnt raise the debt ceiling on its own, but experts have floated a few options for the president to consider to avert a crisis. None of these are free from risk, and all would likely spark considerable litigation that could in turn cause market turmoil. But all would be preferable to defaulting on US debt.
</p>
<h3 id="DTHUCY">
How Biden could kill the debt ceiling
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="GZ2kOA">
There are at least four ways a president could nullify the debt ceiling without Congress.
</p>
<h4 id="ACnNH3">
<ol type="1">
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">Mint the coin
</li></ol></h4>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="YDv5Qu">
Its strange but true: As blogger <a href="https://www.vox.com/22711346/trillion-dollar-coin-mintthecoin-debt-ceiling-beowulf">Carlos Mucha</a> <a href="https://web.archive.org/web/20100604051310/http://moslereconomics.com/2010/05/14/marshalls-latest/">pointed out</a> back in 2010, an existing law gives the US treasury secretary the power to issue platinum coins of any value she wishes.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="skwOAH">
The <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2013/01/04/michael-castle-unsuspecting-godfather-of-the-1-trillion-coin-solution/">intention</a> of the original 1997 law was about making it easier to produce platinum coins for the international coin collector market, but in 2011, Mucha <a href="https://www.pragcap.com/lets-end-this-debt-ceiling-debate-with-a-1-oz-1t-coin/">revived</a> the idea in the context of that years debt ceiling standoff. The treasury secretary could issue, say, a platinum coin worth $2 trillion, deposit it into the Treasurys account at the Fed, and use those funds to sustain the government until the debt ceiling is raised.
</p>
<div class="c-float-left">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt="A visualization of what a $1 trillion coin could look like." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/VV0GvY1wt2m6XO_kpO4LTrU_xeI=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/22881763/8349514053_afdd89e0b8_o.jpg"/> <cite><a class="ql-link" href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/donkeyhotey/8349514053" target="_blank">DonkeyHotey via Flickr</a></cite>
<figcaption>
How beautiful a $1 trillion coin could be.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="TYxIZB">
The Obama administration found the idea <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2013/01/12/treasury-we-wont-mint-a-platinum-coin-to-sidestep-the-debt-ceiling/">too unserious</a> there to use, but the legal case for minting the coin is <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2013/01/08/former-head-of-u-s-mint-the-platinum-coin-option-would-work/?variant=116ae929826d1fd3">as solid as platinum</a>. Just ask debt ceiling hardliner <a href="https://govtrackinsider.com/cancel-the-coin-act-would-prevent-the-treasury-from-creating-a-1-trillion-coin-or-even-a-28-3f6e67f70cb2">Sen. Mike Lee (R-UT)</a>, who was sufficiently concerned about the option to introduce legislation to close the platinum coin loophole. The plain text of the 1997 law clearly allows the treasury secretary to do this, and Jay Powell, the Fed chair who in a past career was <a href="https://www.cnn.com/2019/07/19/politics/default-jerome-powell-history/index.html">an expert on the debt ceiling and its dangers</a>, is arguably <a href="http://neweconomicperspectives.org/2013/01/can-the-federal-reserve-really-refuse-to-accept-and-to-credit-a-platinum-coin-deposited-by-the-us-mint.html">legally required to accept the coin</a> as a deposit.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="vILUnk">
You can also imagine more serious variations on the concept. Progressive economist Mike Konczal once <a href="https://web.archive.org/web/20130113040123/https://www.nextnewdeal.net/rortybomb/should-president-obama-announce-no-prioritizing-payments-debt-ceiling-or-start-minting">proposed issuing a $20 billion coin every day</a> to keep the government running until Congress agrees to abolish the debt ceiling for good. And a $20 billion coin is, what, 1 percent as silly as a $2 trillion one?
</p>
<h4 id="KJCBcs">
<ol start="2" type="1">
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">Invoke the 14th Amendment
</li></ol></h4>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="ZWD1DQ">
Some legal scholars have argued that Section 4 of the <a href="https://www.law.cornell.edu/constitution/amendmentxiv">14th Amendment</a>, which specifies that “the validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law … shall not be questioned,” renders the debt ceiling unconstitutional, as it threatens the validity of the USs public debts by creating the possibility of default.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="3eqd2W">
This is hardly a consensus position among constitutional law experts, but if Biden were to declare he was ignoring the debt ceiling because its unconstitutional, its not clear that anyone would have <a href="https://newrepublic.com/article/92884/supreme-court-obama-debt-ceiling">legal standing to sue him</a> and challenge the decision. That helped encourage a number of political actors, from then-House Minority Leader <a href="https://www.huffpost.com/entry/nancy-pelosi-14th-amendment-debt_n_3991148?utm_hp_ref=politics">Nancy Pelosi</a> to former President <a href="https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2011/07/20/138511612/bill-clinton-says-hed-raise-the-debt-ceiling-using-14th-amendment">Bill Clinton</a>, to urge Obama to invoke the 14th Amendment during his debt ceiling showdowns.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="hrchGK">
Obama declined repeatedly, <a href="https://constitutioncenter.org/blog/can-a-president-invoke-the-14th-amendment-to-raise-the-debt-ceiling">arguing</a> in 2013 that “if you start having a situation in which theres legal controversy about the US Treasurys authority to issue debt, the damage will have been done, even if that were constitutional, because people wouldnt be sure.”
</p>
<h4 id="GkvcdO">
<ol start="3" type="1">
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">Declare ignoring the debt ceiling to be the “least unconstitutional” option
</li></ol></h4>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="PZrZic">
University of Florida law professor Neil Buchanan and Cornell law professor Michael Dorf <a href="https://scholarship.law.cornell.edu/facpub/591/">have</a>, in a <a href="https://scholarship.law.ufl.edu/facultypub/945/">series</a> of <a href="https://scholarship.law.gwu.edu/faculty_publications/323/">papers</a>, proposed a way out of the debt ceiling thats related to but distinct from the 14th Amendment option.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="LW3WQO">
Buchanan and Dorf note that Congress, by setting spending and tax policy as well as a debt limit, has given the president three mandates: to spend the amount Congress authorizes, to tax the amount Congress authorizes, and to issue as much debt as Congress authorizes. When the debt ceiling is breached, it becomes impossible for the president to obey all three of these legal requirements.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="RdBJMd">
Prioritizing spending on certain activities and cutting it elsewhere usurps Congresss spending power by cutting spending unilaterally. Raising taxes without congressional authority would usurp Congresss taxing power. And ignoring the debt ceiling would usurp Congresss power to set debt limits.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="n2N2sG">
The last option — respecting Congresss taxing and spending powers while ignoring its debt limit — is the “least unconstitutional” option, Buchanan and Dorf argue. This judgment would no doubt be challenged in court, but its arguably less dramatic than the president unilaterally declaring the debt ceiling a violation of the 14th Amendment.
</p>
<h4 id="LHyfKb">
<ol start="4" type="1">
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">Issuing quasi-debt while the crisis plays out
</li></ol></h4>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="kgc8Lj">
Steven Schwarcz, a professor at Duke Law and expert on capital markets, has proposed getting around the debt ceiling by having the Treasury Department <a href="https://scholarship.law.duke.edu/faculty_scholarship/3228/">create a “special-purpose entity” to issue new securities</a>, distinct from traditional Treasury bonds, that can pay for government expenditures. Because theyre not Treasury bonds, these securities would not be subject to the debt limit.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Cgc5ZE">
This may seem bizarre, but Schwarcz got the idea from <a href="https://scholarship.law.duke.edu/faculty_scholarship/2451/">state and municipal finance in the US</a>; many states raise most of their debt with special-purpose entities, rather than by directly issuing bonds, often so they can get around their own state debt limits.
</p>
<h3 id="xkFq28">
What a 2023 budget deal might look like
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="aHvW0o">
Ideally, Biden will use one of the above methods to evade the debt ceiling and prevent Kevin McCarthy and his caucus from using the threat of federal government default to extract policy concessions.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="LA3O3p">
But these are all relatively dramatic steps, and its possible that Biden will, like Obama before him, demure and ultimately accept that he needs to bargain with McCarthy and agree to spending cuts to get a debt ceiling increase passed. If that happens, its worth considering what such a spending cut deal will look like.
</p>
<div>
<div class="c-image-grid">
<div class="c-image-grid__item">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/R6c7e1ig1Uw2mrtWHXvfLrrSrjU=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24347600/GettyImages_1454751557a.jpg"/> <cite>Win McNamee/Getty Images</cite>
<figcaption>
Rep. Kevin McCarthy celebrates after being elected speaker of the House on January 7.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
<div class="c-image-grid__item">
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/lT_pvl3GjHlOnoHxtsRMJRYDysQ=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24347599/GettyImages_1246018579a.jpg"/> <cite>Drew Angerer/Getty Images</cite>
<figcaption>
President Joe Biden speaks in the Roosevelt Room at the White House on January 5.
</figcaption>
</figure>
</div>
</div>
</div>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="ldNW7S">
The best guide here is the 2011 Budget Control Act, the result of that years debt ceiling standoff. The Obama White House took a firm line against any deal that cut Social Security or Medicare without increasing taxes. For a brief time, House Speaker John Boehner seemed to be playing ball, <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/01/magazine/obama-vs-boehner-who-killed-the-debt-deal.html">agreeing to as much as $800 billion in revenue increases</a>, but it soon became clear that he could not get his caucus to support major tax increases. Without the tax hikes, the Social Security and Medicare cuts that Obama was open to — like <a href="https://www.latimes.com/politics/la-xpm-2011-jul-07-la-na-debt-ceiling-20110708-story.html">slowing cost-of-living adjustments for the former</a> and <a href="https://www.politico.com/story/2011/07/medicare-at-67-the-next-big-change-060141">raising the age for the latter to 67</a> — went off the table.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Ch8n5R">
And while Republicans have ideological reasons to want to cut Social Security and Medicare, their older-than-average voting base, combined with those programs <a href="https://www.dataforprogress.org/blog/2022/10/6/democrats-and-voters-support-expanding-social-security">overwhelming</a> <a href="https://press.aarp.org/2021-5-26-AARP-Survey-Overwhelming-Bipartisan-Majority-Oppose-Social-Security-and-Medicare-Cuts-to-Reduce-Deficit">popularity</a>, also give them reasons to avoid cuts in this area.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="AWoUvS">
So the ultimate 2011 deal kicked the can down the road. It included <a href="https://www.pgpf.org/analysis/peter-g-peterson-foundation-analysis-of-the-budget-control-act-of-2011">$917 billion in direct spending cuts</a>, mostly implemented by capping “discretionary” spending, which includes defense programs and everything else the government does that isnt a mandatory entitlement program like Social Security, food stamps, or veterans benefits.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="vtKARr">
The bill then mandated another $1.2 trillion in deficit reduction to be determined through a congressional committee (colloquially called “the supercommittee”). If the supercommittee failed to put together a package slashing $1.2 trillion through tax hikes or spending cuts, indiscriminate spending cuts would ensue through forced decreases in the caps on defense and non-defense discretionary spending. Unless Congress passed spending bills with totals below these new, even lower caps, a “sequestration” process forcing across-the-board cuts to every affected program would ensue.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="bLX1bZ">
The across-the-board cuts included as a backup were never meant to take effect. They were an enforcement mechanism meant to pressure Congress into making a deal, the equivalent of paying a guy from Craigslist to punch you if you dont get your work done on deadline.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="M3uxbN">
But the <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/debt-committee-failure-will-become-official-with-written-joint-statement/2011/11/21/gIQAfRmCiN_story.html">supercommittee failed</a>, forcing those spending cuts. Because the deal took cuts to Social Security, Medicaid, and the beneficiary side of Medicare off the table, the toll on Americans was lighter than it could have been. (Medicare payments to providers were cut, though, which <a href="https://www.jstor.org/stable/42568845">some</a> <a href="https://www.nber.org/system/files/working_papers/w16859/w16859.pdf">studies</a> have found reduces quality of care received.) Further, Congress agreed in another deal at the end of 2012 to delay the sequestration cuts for two months, so they began on March 1, 2013. But they took effect then, as planned.
</p>
<h3 id="xI031A">
The consequences of the 2013 sequestration
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="8vssCz">
The <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2013/02/20/the-sequester-absolutely-everything-you-could-possibly-need-to-know-in-one-faq/">sequestration</a> led to 7.7 percent across-the-board cuts to defense and 5.1 percent across-the-board cuts to domestic discretionary spending. Military operations funding fell by $17.1 billion, National Institutes of Health funding by $1.6 billion, nuclear weapons security by $903 million, border security and immigration enforcement by a combined $890 million, and on and on.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="CTPaHG">
Perhaps worse, agency heads had little to no flexibility in distributing these cuts; every “program, project, and activity” had to be cut equally, and “activity” was defined to include things <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2013/02/22/heres-how-you-run-a-sequester-scrape-five-percent-less-poop/">as small as a single buoy the government floated in the Chesapeake Bay</a>. That buoy, somehow, had to be cut by 5 percent (in practice, that meant scraping 5 percent less bird poop off the buoy).
</p>
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt="A pie chart illustrating the numerous categories of non-defense discretionary spending; no category comprises more than 18 percent of the spending." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/SpkTjV2VpF83wASylDOXZ8-lZKw=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24198845/3_25_21bud_f1.png"/> <cite><a class="ql-link" href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-budget/boosts-in-non-defense-appropriations-needed-due-to-decade-of-cuts-unmet" target="_blank">Center on Budget and Policy Priorities</a></cite>
<figcaption>
The composition of non-defense discretionary spending in 2021.
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="bu2xqj">
These across-the-board cuts, though, only came because Congress approved spending bills totaling more than the caps they set for themselves (again, assuming the cuts wouldnt actually take effect). After 2013, Congress knew it had to pass spending bills that did abide by the caps, after which no across-the-board cuts would ensue. It simply had to make decisions about what spending it wanted to prioritize, subject to those limits. It also could, and occasionally did, change the caps, as in the <a href="https://www.crfb.org/blogs/updated-summarizing-ryan-murray-deal">2013</a> and <a href="https://www.crfb.org/blogs/budget-deal-truly-offsets-only-half-its-cost">2015</a> budget deals, which raised defense and non-defense spending caps in the short term, partially offsetting that with lower spending later on. The <a href="https://www.crfb.org/blogs/bipartisan-budget-act-means-return-trillion-dollar-deficits">2018</a> and <a href="https://www.crfb.org/blogs/policymakers-added-22-trillion-debt-2019">2019</a> budget deals under Trump increased the caps still further and barely included any offsets, driven largely by a Republican desire to restore defense spending.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="2krS7c">
Taking all these changes together, the Committee on a Responsible Federal Budgets Goldwein told me, the Budget Control Act of 2011, the fruit of the debt ceiling crisis, resulted in $1.2 trillion or so in overall deficit reduction. This was less than the $2.1 trillion originally promised (due to the repeated deals which raised the budget caps), but it was still a sizable hit. Overall spending was substantially lower from 2011 until the Covid-19 pandemic hit (and threw the federal budget into general chaos) than previously planned.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="duuKcY">
So, what did this all mean for actual users of government services? For some, the impact was temporary. Head Start, the pre-K program for low-income children, <a href="https://www.acf.hhs.gov/archive/blog/2013/08/numbers-are">kicked 57,000 kids off its rolls</a> when the sequestration hit, kids who permanently lost access to the program. But <a href="https://eclkc.ohs.acf.hhs.gov/policy/pi/acf-pi-hs-14-01">the next year</a>, funding was restored and stayed roughly on track for the rest of the decade. Some affected spending categories rose dramatically over this period, most notably health care for veterans, which members of Congress prioritized in appropriations bills.
</p>
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt="A chart showing which categories of non-defense discretionary spending grew and fell between 2010 and 2021. An accessible table with the same data is available at the Center on Budget and Policy Prioritiess website." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/y3bTDc5xae8Y9wcSFX6of1_gOSk=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24198849/3_25_21bud_f3.png"/> <cite><a class="ql-link" href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-budget/boosts-in-non-defense-appropriations-needed-due-to-decade-of-cuts-unmet" target="_blank">Center on Budget and Policy Priorities</a></cite>
<figcaption>
Veterans health care funding grew dramatically, but every other category of non-defense discretionary spending fell after adjusting for inflation and population growth.
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="KJkkEA">
So what did suffer? The <a href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-budget/boosts-in-non-defense-appropriations-needed-due-to-decade-of-cuts-unmet">Center on Budget and Policy Priorities David Reich</a> co-authored a category-by-category report and found that, between 2010 and 2021, every single category of non-defense discretionary spending besides veterans programs saw declines after adjusting for inflation and population growth. Economic security, health care, and scientific research programs were close to stagnant, falling by 4 percent or less. But funding for environmental protection and parks fell by 15 percent; general government operations by 26 percent; education and job training by 14 percent; diplomacy and foreign aid by 19 percent; agriculture, energy, and commerce by 19 percent.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="28K5VZ">
Housing vouchers through the Section 8 program could not keep up with rents; the <a href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/housing/budget-caps-not-rent-aid-forcing-hud-budget-cuts">center estimated</a> that between 2010 and 2017, voucher funding fell by 9 percent after adjusting for rent inflation, resulting in “significant decreases in the number of families that were being served over that time,” Peggy Bailey, the centers vice president for housing and income security and a former senior adviser to HUD Secretary Marcia Fudge, told me <a href="https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2022/11/16/23433281/congress-debt-ceiling-house-midterms-spending-cuts-lame-duck-session">last year</a>.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="XAwRnE">
A <a href="https://www.aaas.org/news/budget-control-act-may-have-cost-over-200-billion-federal-rd">study from the American Association for the Advancement of Science</a> found that aggregate research and development spending from the federal government was $200 billion lower due to the Budget Control Act; health research from the National Institutes of Health and the VA fell by over $7 billion a year relative to previous historical trends, while the National Science Foundation got almost $2 billion a year less.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="WxFmki">
This was all bad news for people interacting with government programs. The two biggest social assistance agencies in the US are the Social Security Administration (which administers old-age and disability payments) and the IRS, which administers tax credits that are crucial for reducing poverty. Adjusted for inflation, funding for the agencies <a href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-budget/boosts-in-non-defense-appropriations-needed-due-to-decade-of-cuts-unmet">fell by 13 and 19 percent</a> between 2010 and 2021, respectively.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="BRgrKq">
Perhaps the single worst category of cuts that took effect — given what followed — were to programs related to pandemic preparedness and effectiveness. As <a href="https://www.cbpp.org/research/federal-budget/boosts-in-non-defense-appropriations-needed-due-to-decade-of-cuts-unmet">Reich and Katie Windham note</a>, the Centers for Disease Control and Preventions budget fell by 7 percent between 2010 and 2021, and its grants to state and local public health agencies fell by 20 percent. That <a href="https://www.thelancet.com/journals/laninf/article/PIIS1473-3099(20)30182-1/fulltext">almost certainly hampered</a> Americas ability to anticipate and respond to pandemics like Covid-19, and almost certainly cost lives.
</p>
<h3 id="ETdqXA">
How will this play out?
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="FOZkz3">
In short: We dont know — though time is running out.<strong> </strong>
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Yy2I2G">
Secretary Yellen said in her letter that she would begin suspending new investments in the Civil Service Retirement and Disability Fund and the Postal Service Retiree Health Benefits Fund and suspending reinvestment of the Government Securities Investment Fund of the Federal Employees Retirement System Thrift Savings Plan later this month, all in an effort to delay hitting the ceiling. While House Speaker Kevin McCarthy got his job by promising a fight on the debt ceiling, his majority is very narrow, meaning that six or more Republican defections could enable Democrats to pass a “clean” increase using a tool called a <a href="https://archives-democrats-rules.house.gov/archives/discharge_pet.htm">discharge petition</a>, through which a majority can force a floor vote in the House even if leadership doesnt want one. (This is an important plot point in the 2003 classic <a href="https://time.com/5310427/discharge-petition-legally-blonde-screenwriter/"><em>Legally Blonde 2: Red White &amp; Blonde</em></a>, our modern-day <em>Mr. Smith Goes to Washington</em>.)
</p>
<figure class="e-image">
<img alt=" " src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/TbPG_sqYsF_EYgK8Hgm23WC6_n0=/800x0/filters:no_upscale()/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_asset/file/24347618/AP23006696561452a.jpg"/> <cite>J. Scott Applewhite/AP</cite>
<figcaption>
Members of the conservative House Freedom Caucus, including, from left, Reps. Dan Bishop, Andy Ogles, Chip Roy, and Scott Perry, were among those who demanded concessions from Speaker Kevin McCarthy regarding the debt ceiling before agreeing to vote to hand him the gavel.
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="uurg2d">
Personally, though, Im steeling myself for a repeat of the 2011 budget deal, precisely because the dynamics that led to it narrowly focusing on a small sliver of the budget are still there. Republicans are if anything even more vehemently opposed to tax increases, and Democrats are equally vehemently opposed to tax hikes affecting all but the richest 1 percent or so of Americans. Social Security and Medicare are still hot potatoes, and while other “mandatory” programs like food stamps are less popular, Democrats have historically held firm against any cuts to them.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="9Nu3US">
That leaves discretionary programs, both defense and non-defense, covering everything from the FBI to medical research to US embassies abroad. Those programs took a severe battering during the 2010s under the Budget Control Act, and theres every reason to expect them to take a battering in whatever deal emerges in 2023. The consequences are not straightforward, but could weaken important parts of the government that have already been underfunded for a decade. And the odds of a showdown actually addressing the drivers of the long-run budget deficit — inadequate tax revenue, an aging population with growing health and pension bills — are basically zero.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="fL6iyp">
The one thing debt ceiling fights never do is solve the debt issue.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Vtgh8s">
<em><strong>Update, January 13, 3 pm ET: </strong></em><em>This story was originally published on January 10 and has been updated with news on the timing of when the US may hit the debt ceiling.</em>
</p></li>
<li><strong>How the George Santos scandal could finally end</strong> -
<figure>
<img alt="Rep. George Santos walks through a Capitol hallway with a to-go coffee cup in hand." src="https://cdn.vox-cdn.com/thumbor/1ElD9plMbl2NQY_93N1Fg4gjLy4=/321x0:6986x4999/1310x983/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/71856767/1246130269.0.jpg"/>
<figcaption>
Newly elected Rep. George Santos walks to a GOP caucus meeting in the US Capitol on January 10. | Drew Angerer/Getty Images
</figcaption>
</figure>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
New Republican Congress member George Santos has been caught in a series of lies about his résumé. How long can he last in Congress?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="P3zhfW">
Now that <a href="https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2023/1/7/23543163/kevin-mccarthy-speaker-of-the-house-vote-elected">the House of Representatives finally has a speaker</a>, the nations attention is turning back to the fate of a first-term Congress member from Long Island with a fondness for <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/2023/01/03/george-santos-first-day-in-congress/">sweaters</a>. After <a href="https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/23520848/george-santos-fake-resume">reports that George Santos fabricated parts of his résumé surfaced in December</a>, his political fortunes are now front-page news again. The hallway outside the New York Republicans office has become a veritable cable news studio as reporters and cameras stake him out to get fresh images of Santos dodging questions.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="F20DsF">
While Santos has faced criticism for weeks from Democrats over his long and elaborate history of lies about his biography, now top Republicans in his district are denouncing him. On Wednesday, at a press conference in New York, Santos <a href="https://www.politico.com/news/2023/01/11/local-n-y-gop-leaders-to-call-on-george-santos-to-resign-00077450">was condemned</a> by the chair of the <a href="https://www.politico.com/states/new-york/albany/story/2011/02/the-fall-of-the-nassau-republican-machine-and-the-rise-of-homeland-security-chair-peter-king-067223">Nassau County Republican Party</a>, the Nassau county executive, and Anthony DEsposito, the newly elected GOP Congress member from a neighboring district — they all demanded that Santos resign. This <a href="https://www.cpnys.org/2023/01/11/statement-from-new-york-state-conservative-party-chairman-gerard-kassar-calling-for-resignation-of-rep-george-santos/">was followed</a> by the New York Conservative Party demanding that Santos resign in a press release that described him as morally disqualified from serving in public office.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Z1Kkcf">
The question is what Santos does now. These are four possible scenarios.
</p>
<h3 id="ZOJRCf">
Santos is expelled from office
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="cMDo6n">
Once he became a representative-elect, the House was constitutionally required to seat Santos, but now that he is a member, he can be expelled at any time. The Constitution provides that the House can expel any member “with the Concurrence of two-thirds.” As Josh Chafetz, a constitutional law professor at Georgetown, said, this can happen “for basically any reason” and is not legally reviewable.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="R6vlfo">
However, expulsion is rare in American history and only five members of the House have ever been expelled. Three were Confederates, and two refused to resign after being convicted of corruption. (The most recent was <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/james-a-traficant-jr-colorful-ohio-congressman-expelled-by-house-dies-at-73/2014/09/27/fa98868a-4431-11e4-9a15-137aa0153527_story.html">Rep. Jim Traficant</a>, an eccentric Democrat from Ohio known for his unruly hairpiece and habit of ending every floor speech with the phrase “beam me up.”) As Chafetz noted, “when it becomes plausible that a congressman might be expelled, they usually resign in order to prevent the embarrassment.”
</p>
<h3 id="khTxOx">
Santos resigns
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="39hm38">
Santos <a href="https://twitter.com/Santos4Congress/status/1613234542650982400">has insisted</a> on Twitter, “I will NOT resign!” However, the precariousness of his position is made clear by the fact that he felt it necessary to adamantly insist that he is not leaving Capitol Hill only days after arriving in Washington. Not only is he already facing state and local criminal investigations, but hes also the subject of complaints to the House Ethics Committee. One complaint to the House Ethics Committee was hand-delivered by two fellow members of the New York delegation, Reps. Dan Goldman (D-NY) and <a href="https://www.washingtonexaminer.com/politics/the-unconventional-congressman">Ritchie Torres (D-NY)</a>, to a media frenzy.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="vfPm3Q">
In an interview with Vox Wednesday, former Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY), who <a href="https://www.tabletmag.com/sections/news/articles/republican-jewish-coalition">resigned </a>from Congress after his own scandal in 2011, said that a congressional ethics investigation is “not an easy process and not a cheap process.” Weiner recalled when he was told by Democratic superlawyer Marc Elias that it would cost $1 million in legal fees if he had stayed in office and faced investigation. (Weiner added the caveat that Elias was trying to convince him to resign at the time.) The House Ethics Committee, which operates on a bipartisan basis, only has authority over sitting House members and can recommend sanctions for violations of House rules that require a majority vote to be adopted.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="htzPFU">
If he did resign, a special election would be held on a date chosen by New York Gov. <a href="https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2021/08/andrew-cuomo-impeachment-is-kathy-hochul-ready.html">Kathy Hochul</a>, and the nominees would be selected by party committees, not through a primary. Further, if Republicans are eager to hold on to Santoss seat, they might calculate that their chances are better in a low-turnout special election than by waiting until November 2024, when voters are likely to revert to their traditional partisan corners, particularly in a district that Joe Biden won in 2020.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="QIMW0s">
Then again, there is no reason for Santos to care about the opinions of other Republicans — particularly those who have already called for him to leave office. In an interview with<a href="https://nymag.com/intelligencer/2021/03/matt-gaetz-gets-a-scandal-as-wild-as-him.html"> Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL)</a> on Steve Bannons podcast, Santos <a href="https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/george-santos-now-hell-resign-142-people/story?id=96390118">was defiant</a>: “Its their prerogative … I wish well all of their opinions, but I was elected by 142,000 people. Until those same 142,000 people tell me they dont want me — well find out in two years.”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="1kH6ni">
Further, an immediate Santos resignation would greatly reduce his leverage if prosecutors do turn up misconduct in investigating his questionable finances. Instead, it legally makes more sense to save any resignation as part of plea bargain negotiations where it is one of the few cards that he would have available.
</p>
<h3 id="Ld4RzH">
Santos doesnt run again
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="Edw1Ya">
There have been <a href="https://www.politico.com/news/2022/12/28/george-santos-kevin-mccarthy-house-speaker-00075706">reports</a> that Santos has already reassured top Republicans in his district that he does not plan to run again. Considering that he is now a political punchline who is under state, local, and federal investigation, a willingness not to seek reelection is not much of a concession. Every revelation by Santos only makes him seem more ridiculous. On Wednesday, it was revealed that he lied to Republican officials about playing on a championship-winning volleyball team at Baruch College — not only did Santos not play on the team, he did not attend Baruch College. The New York Times also published <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/11/nyregion/george-santos-resume.html">a copy of the résumé</a> that Santos had circulated when running for office, which included false claims about his college education and employment history.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="1lujXx">
By bunkering down, Santos would continue to collect a federal salary and benefits, when it is unclear what other sources of income he has and how else he would cover his legal costs as his legal woes mount. It also would help new House Speaker Kevin McCarthy hold on to his slim, five-seat majority. If Santos resigns, theres no guarantee he would be replaced by a fellow Republican. While Republicans might have better chances of holding the seat in a special election than if they wait until November, it might not be worth gambling a swing seat when the current majority is so tenuous.
</p>
<h3 id="vsfc87">
Santos is reelected
</h3>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="KcBhsT">
LOL. Not even George Santos could make up a scenario where this would happen.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom" id="t0oON2">
<em><strong>Update, January 13, 12:15 pm ET:</strong></em> <em>This story was originally published on January 12 and has been updated with Santoss comments on calls for him to resign. </em>
</p></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-the-hindu-sports">From The Hindu: Sports</h1>
<ul>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Eridani, Cyrenius and Flying Quest impress</strong> -</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>The Test season 2 review: Less drama, more goodwill and unprecedented access to the Australian cricket team</strong> - The second season of the Prime Video series is all about the Pat Cummins era, and Australia spreading cheer when on tour</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Ethics Officer dismisses Conflict of Interest complaint against BCCI president Roger Binny</strong> - Complainant Sanjeev Gupta has been filing complaints against who's who of Indian cricket.</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>2023 Mens Hockey World Cup | Confident India take on aggressive England in the battle for top spot</strong> - India, England face off will be on January 15, 2023 at Birsa Munda stadium at 7 pm</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Hockey India mulls over reviving HIL</strong> - While there is no official confirmation, sources confirmed that after cricket and kabaddi, Adani Sportsline is one of the leading corporate houses in talks for owning one of the franchises.</p></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-the-hindu-national-news">From The Hindu: National News</h1>
<ul>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Andhra Pradesh: BC Welfare Minister felicitates sanitation workers for their service in Konaseema district</strong> - People should be thankful to them for maintaining cleanliness in towns and villages</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Teacher arrested on charge of molesting 26 schoolchildren</strong> - Children of school in Kannur disclosed their ordeal to the counsellor at a session in school</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Tepid response to FSSAIs BHOG certification in Kerala</strong> - BHOG aims at encouraging places of worship to adopt and maintain food safety and hygiene while preparing prasad; Only one out of 1, 623 places of worship in Kerala registered with the Food Safety department has received the certification.</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Solar power for schools</strong> -</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>We really need to think about a new kind of engagement between the scientific community and society: Cell biologist Ron Vale</strong> - College level textbooks in the U.S. are very expensive and Id imagine in India too. That seems wrong and that kind of knowledge should be free. We have a responsibility to make science interesting and accessible, says Ron Vale.</p></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-bbc-europe">From BBC: Europe</h1>
<ul>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Soledar: Russia claims victory in battle for Ukraine salt mine town</strong> - Russia says it has captured the salt-mine town after a long battle, but Ukraine says fighting continues.</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Putin ally says expat war critics should lose homes</strong> - Parliament speaker Vyacheslav Volodin says Russian critics abroad should have property confiscated.</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Greek charges dropped for 24 who rescued migrants</strong> - Volunteers who saved migrants will not be tried for espionage - but other charges remain.</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Czech presidential vote: All to play for after 10 years of Zeman</strong> - Seven men and one woman are vying to succeed Milos Zeman, in a vote likely to go to a run-off.</p></li>
<li data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Ukraine defence minister: We are a de facto member of Nato alliance</strong> - Oleksii Reznikovs comments are set to provoke Russia, which frames the war as a battle with the West.</p></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-ars-technica">From Ars Technica</h1>
<ul>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>An aviation expert explains how the FAAs critical NOTAM safety system works</strong> - This is why planes cant fly when NOTAM goes down. - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1910029">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Meta sues “scraping-for-hire” service that sells user data to law enforcement</strong> - Israeli firm says it uses AI to analyze “billions of human pixels and signals.” - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1910046">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Amid Chinas massive COVID wave, 42% of people on one flight tested positive</strong> - Another reminder to keep those masks on during flights. - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1910066">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Best Buy offers free shipping for all members, but cuts Totaltech benefits</strong> - Also, the points program will now be exclusive to Best Buy Credit Card holders. - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1910025">link</a></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Ars is reviewing HBOs The Last of Us series</strong> - One critic whos played the games and one who hasnt—were the original odd couple! - <a href="https://arstechnica.com/?p=1909994">link</a></p></li>
</ul>
<h1 data-aos="fade-right" id="from-jokes-subreddit">From Jokes Subreddit</h1>
<ul>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>A pastor was on his way home from an oil change. On the way, he decided to stop at a church members house.</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF --></p>
<div class="md">
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
After ringing the doorbell the pastor was sure that he saw movement inside the house. He rung the doorbell again, and the pastor noticed someone moving quickly from one room to another. The pastor whipped out a “Several Steps to Becoming a Christian” pamphlet, and quickly scrawled on it Revelation 3:20, “Behold, I stand at the door and knock”, left it wedged in the door, and left.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that the pamphlet was on the plate. Under what the pastor wrote was written Genesis 3:10: “I heard your voice and I was afraid for I was naked, and I hid myself”.
</p>
</div>
<!-- SC_ON -->
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/Wondering_Hard"> /u/Wondering_Hard </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10bcldt/a_pastor_was_on_his_way_home_from_an_oil_change/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10bcldt/a_pastor_was_on_his_way_home_from_an_oil_change/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>“When I eat alphabet soup, I only eat…”</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF --></p>
<div class="md">
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
the vowels."
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Friend: “Why?”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Me: “Sometimes.”
</p>
</div>
<!-- SC_ON -->
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/terenandceleste"> /u/terenandceleste </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10ayrdx/when_i_eat_alphabet_soup_i_only_eat/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10ayrdx/when_i_eat_alphabet_soup_i_only_eat/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>Anger Management Works!</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF --></p>
<div class="md">
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, dont take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you dont know, but you know deserves it…
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call Id forgotten to make.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I found the number and dialed it.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
A man answered, saying Hello.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I politely said, This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear Get the right f***ing number! And the phone was slammed down on me.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I couldnt believe that anyone could be so rude.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
When I tracked down Robyns correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
After hanging up with her, I decided to call the wrong number again.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled Youre an asshole! And hung up.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I wrote his number down with the word asshole next to it, And put it in my desk drawer.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, Id call him up and yell, Youre an asshole!
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
It always cheered me up.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic asshole calling would have to stop.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
So, I called his number and said, Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company. Im calling to see if youre familiar with our Caller ID Program?
</p>
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He yelled NO! And slammed down the phone.
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I quickly called him back and said, Thats because youre an asshole! And hung up.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot.
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<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I hit the horn and yelled that Id been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I noticed a For Sale sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his number on speed dial) I thought that Id better call the BMW asshole, too.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Yes, it is.
</p>
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I then asked, Can you tell me where I can see it?
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<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd. , in Fairfax Its a yellow ranch style house And the cars parked right out in front.
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<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I asked, Whats your name?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, My name is Don Hansen.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I asked, Whens a good time to catch you, Don?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Im home every evening after five.
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<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Listen, Don, can I tell you something?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Yes?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Don, youre an asshole!
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Then I came up with an idea…
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<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I called asshole #1.
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<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Hello
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Youre an asshole! (But I didnt hang up.)
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He asked, Are you still there?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Yeah!
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He screamed, Stop calling me
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Make me.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He asked, Who are you?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, My name is Don Hansen.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Yeah? Where do you live?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd., in Fairfax, a yellow ranch style home and I have a black Beamer parked in front.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Im coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Yeah, like Im really scared, asshole, and hung up.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Then I called Asshole #2.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He said, Hello?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Hello, asshole,
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He yelled, If I ever find out who you are…
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I said, Youll what?
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He exclaimed, Ill kick your ass
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I answered, Well, asshole, heres your chance. Im coming over right now.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I was on my way over to 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, to kill my gay lover.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Then I called Channel 7 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd in Fairfax . I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax .
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
NOW I feel much better.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
Anger management really does work.
</p>
</div>
<!-- SC_ON -->
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/pinkstevie"> /u/pinkstevie </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10bgz8g/anger_management_works/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10bgz8g/anger_management_works/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>My wife was upset that the dog was considered mans best friend. She maintains that a spouse should be considered my best friend.</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF --></p>
<div class="md">
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
So I locked them both in the trunk of my car and drove around for twenty minutes. Guess which one was happiest to see me when I let them out?
</p>
</div>
<!-- SC_ON -->
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/cruiserman_80"> /u/cruiserman_80 </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10aqt1y/my_wife_was_upset_that_the_dog_was_considered/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10aqt1y/my_wife_was_upset_that_the_dog_was_considered/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
<li><p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"><strong>True Story that is also a joke. (It really is true.)</strong> - <!-- SC_OFF --></p>
<div class="md">
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I was doing tourist stuff in New Orleans one summer and had gone down to the waterfront. I was sitting on a bench looking out at the water when a guy came up to me and offered me a bet. He said, “I bet you $5 I can tell you where you got your shoes.”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I was from several states away so I figured there was no way this guy could guess which shoe store at the local mall I had purchased my sneakers at. So I agreed to the bet.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
The guy put out his hand for us to shake on it and assured me he would pay if he was wrong and asked me to do the same. I did.
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
He grinned and said,“Now Im gonna tell you where you got your shoes. You got your shoes on your feet!.”
</p>
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom">
I laughed and paid the five dollars.
</p>
</div>
<!-- SC_ON -->
<p data-aos="fade-left" data-aos-anchor-placement="bottom-bottom"> submitted by <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/makkdom"> /u/makkdom </a> <br/> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10bdgz9/true_story_that_is_also_a_joke_it_really_is_true/">[link]</a></span> <span><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/10bdgz9/true_story_that_is_also_a_joke_it_really_is_true/">[comments]</a></span></p></li>
</ul>
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