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+ + + ++Making accurate forecasting of COVID-19 cases is essential for healthcare systems, with more than 650 million cases as of 4 January,1 making it one of the worst in history. The goal of this research is to improve the precision of COVID-19 case predictions in Russia, India, and Brazil, a transformer-based model was developed. Several researchers have implemented a combination of CNNs and LSTMs, Long Short-Term Memory (LSTMs), and Convolutional Neural Networks (CNNs) to calculate the total number of COVID-19 cases. In this study, an effort was made to improve the correctness of the models by incorporating recent advancements in attention-based models for time-series forecasting. The resulting model was found to perform better than other existing models and showed improved accuracy in forecasting. Using the data from different countries and adapting it to the model will enhance its ability to support the worldwide effort to combat the pandemic by giving more precise projections of cases. +
++Both viral infection and vaccination affect the antibody repertoire of a person. Here we demonstrate that the analysis of serum antibodies carries information not only on the virus type that caused the infection, but also on the specific virus variant. We developed a rapid multiplex assay providing a fingerprint of serum antibodies against five different SARS-CoV-2 variants, based on a microarray of virus antigens immobilized on the surface of a label-free reflectometric biosensor. We analyzed serum from plasma of convalescent subjects and vaccinated volunteers and extracted individual antibody profiles of both total immunoglobulin Ig and IgA fraction. We found that Ig level profiles were strongly correlated with the specific variant of infection or vaccination and that vaccinated subjects displayed larger quantity of total Ig and lower fraction of IgA relative to the population of convalescent unvaccinated subjects. +
++Protection against SARS-CoV-2 wanes over time, and booster uptake has been low, in part because of concern about side effects. We examined the relationships between local and systemic symptoms, biometric changes, and neutralizing antibodies (nAB) after mRNA vaccination. Data were collected from adults (n = 364) who received two doses of either BNT162b2 or mRNA-1273. Serum nAB concentration was measured at 1 and 6 months post-vaccination. Daily symptom surveys were completed for six days starting on the day of each dose. Concurrently, objective biometric measurements, including skin temperature, heart rate, heart rate variability, and respiratory rate, were collected. We found that certain symptoms (chills, tiredness, feeling unwell, and headache) after the second dose were associated with increases in nAB at 1 and 6 months post-vaccination, to roughly 140-160% the level of individuals without each symptom. Each additional symptom predicted a 1.1-fold nAB increase. Greater increases in skin temperature and heart rate after the second dose predicted higher nAB levels at both time points, but skin temperature change was more predictive of durable (6 month) nAB response than of short-term (1 month) nAB response. In the context of low ongoing vaccine uptake, our convergent symptom and biometric findings suggest that public health messaging could seek to reframe systemic symptoms after vaccination as desirable. +
++Rationale: Sophisticated prognostic scores have been proposed for SARS-CoV-2 but do not always perform consistently. We conducted these meta-analyses to uncover why and to investigate the impact of vaccination and variants. Methods: We searched the PubMed database for the keywords: SARS-CoV-2 with biomarker and mortality. All studies published from 01/12/2020 to 31/03/2023 were surveyed. To aggregate the data, the meta library in R was used, and a random effects model fitted to obtain pooled AUCs and 95% confidence intervals for the European/North American, Asian, and overall datasets. Results: Biomarker effectiveness varies significantly in different continents. Admission CRP levels are a good prognostic marker for mortality in Asian countries, with a pooled area under curve (AUC) of 0.83 (95%CI 0.80-0.85), but only an average predictor of mortality in Europe/North America, with a pooled AUC of 0.67 (95%CI 0.63-0.71, P<0.0001). We observed the same pattern for D-dimer and IL-6. This variability explains why the proposed prognostic scores did not perform evenly. Notably, urea and troponin had pooled AUCs â„0.78 regardless of location, implying that end-organ damage at presentation is a key prognostic factor. Very little data is available for vaccinated and variant cohorts but it appears that inflammatory biomarkers are performing less well. We note a significant lag from the pandemic advent to data availability and this has no doubt impacted on patient care. Conclusions: Biomarker efficacies vary considerably by region. It is imperative that the infrastructure for collecting clinical data should be put in place ahead of a future pandemic. +
++While waning protection from vaccination and natural infection against SARS-CoV-2 infection is well-documented, recent analyses have also found waning of protection against severe COVID-19. This highlights a broader need to understand how different frequency of COVID-19 booster vaccines may mitigate the risk of severe COVID-19, while accounting for waning of protection and differential risk by age and immune status. Here we show that more frequent COVID-19 booster vaccination (every 6-12 months) in older age groups and the immunocompromised population would effectively reduce the burden of severe COVID-19, while frequent boosters in the younger population may only provide modest benefit against severe disease. Analyzing United States COVID-19 surveillance and seroprevalence data in a microsimulation model, we estimated that in persons 75+ years, annual and semiannual boosters would reduce annual absolute risk of severe COVID-19 by 199 (uncertainty interval: 188-229) and 368 (344-413) cases per 100,000 persons, respectively, compared to a one-time booster dose. In contrast, for persons 18-49 years, the model estimated that annual and semiannual boosters would reduce annual absolute risk of severe COVID-19 by 14 (11-19) and 26 (21-35) cases per 100,000 persons, respectively, compared to a one-time booster dose. Persons with prior infection had lower benefit of more frequent boosting, while immunocompromised persons had larger benefit. Scenarios with emerging variants with immune evasion increased the benefit of more frequent variant-targeted boosters. This study underscores the benefit of considering key risk factors to inform frequency of COVID-19 booster vaccines in public health guidance, and ensuring at least annual boosters in high-risk populations. +
+A Phaseâ
Ą Study to Evaluate the Safety and Immunogenicity of SARS-CoV-2 (COVID-19) Vaccine( ZSVG-02-O) - Conditions: SARS-CoV-2 Infection
Interventions: Biological: COVID-19 mRNA Vaccine (ZSVG-02-O); Biological: COVID-19 mRNA Vaccine (ZSVG-02-O); Biological: COVID-19 Vaccine (Vero Cell) ,Inactivated
Sponsors: CNBG-Virogin Biotech (Shanghai) Ltd.
Recruiting
Pilot Randomized Study of RD-X19 Tx Device in Subjects With PCC (Long Covid) in the Outpatient Setting - Conditions: Post COVID-19 Condition (PCC)
Interventions: Device: RDX-19
Sponsors: KNOWBio Inc.; NAMSA
Recruiting
CPAP Therapy Through a Helmet or an Oronasal Mask in Patients With Acute Hypoxemic Respiratory Failure: Cross-over Study - Conditions: Pneumonia, Bacterial; Respiratory Failure; COVID-19 Pneumonia
Interventions: Diagnostic Test: Arterial blood gases; Diagnostic Test: Respiratory rate (RR); Diagnostic Test: Pulseoximeter; Diagnostic Test: Assessment of accessory respiratory muscles work; Diagnostic Test: Esophageal pressure measurement; Diagnostic Test: Discomfort Visual Analog Scale (VAS); Diagnostic Test: Noninvasive blood pressure; Diagnostic Test: Heart rate
Sponsors: I.M. Sechenov First Moscow State Medical University
Recruiting
Investigation of Efficacy and Safety of Electrical Signal Therapy Provided by Dr BiolyseÂź Device in COVID-19 Disease - Conditions: COVID-19 Pneumonia; Virus Diseases; COVID-19
Interventions: Device: Signal Therapy provided by Dr.Biolyse device; Other: Liquid Support Treatment
Sponsors: AVB Biotechnology
Recruiting
A Phaseâ
Study to Evaluate the Safety and Immunogenicity of SARS-CoV-2 (COVID-19) Vaccine( ZSVG-02-O) - Conditions: SARS-CoV-2 Infection
Interventions: Biological: COVID-19 mRNA Vaccine (ZSVG-02-O); Biological: Placebo; Biological: COVID-19 Vaccine (Vero Cell) ,Inactivated
Sponsors: CNBG-Virogin Biotech (Shanghai) Ltd.; Shulan (Hangzhou) Hospital
Recruiting
SAFE Workplace Intervention for People With IDD - Conditions: Developement of Infectious Airborne Disease Prevention Workplace Curriclulm
Interventions: Behavioral: SAFE Employment Training
Sponsors: Temple University; National Institute on Disability, Independent Living, and Rehabilitation Research
Recruiting
Effects of an EMDR Intervention on Traumatic and Obsessive Symptoms - Conditions: Adult ALL; Post-traumatic Stress Disorder; Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder; Disgust; Guilt; Shame
Interventions: Behavioral: EMDR
Sponsors: University of Pisa
Completed
Lithium Long COVID Dose-finding Study - Conditions: Long COVID
Interventions: Dietary Supplement: Lithium
Sponsors: State University of New York at Buffalo
Not yet recruiting
Pharmacokinetics and Safety of GST-HG171 Tablets in Subjects With Impaired and Normal Renal Function - Conditions: COVID-19 Pneumonia
Interventions: Drug: GST-HG171 Tablets
Sponsors: Fujian Akeylink Biotechnology Co., Ltd.
Recruiting
Preoperative Educational Videos on Maternal Stress Whose Children Received Congenital Heart Disease Surgery: During COVID-19 Panic - Conditions: COVID-19; Educational Videos; Maternal; Uncertainty; Anxiety; Depression; Congenital Heart Disease; Children
Interventions: Other: Preoperative educational videos plus routine education; Other: Preoperative routine education
Sponsors: Chung Shan Medical University
Completed
Pharmacokinetics and Safety of GST-HG171 Tablets in Subjects With Impaired and Normal Liver Function - Conditions: COVID-19 Pneumonia
Interventions: Drug: GST-HG171 Tablets
Sponsors: Fujian Akeylink Biotechnology Co., Ltd.
Completed
Evaluation of Concordance Between Exhaled Air Test (eBAM-CoV) and RT-PCR to Detect SARS-CoV-2 - Conditions: SARS-CoV-2 Infection; COVID-19; Coronavirus
Interventions: Device: eBAM Cov Testing
Sponsors: Centre Hospitalier Universitaire de NÄ«mes; University of Nimes; brainsâ laboratory sas, FRANCE
Not yet recruiting
Study to Safety, Tolerability and Immunogenicity of EG-COVII in Healthy Adult - Conditions: COVID-19
Interventions: Biological: EG-COVII
Sponsors: EyeGene Inc.
Recruiting
Pharmacokinetics and Bioequivalence of Aterixen 100 mg Tablets and Aterixen 100 mg Film-coated Tablets in Healthy Volunteers - Conditions: Viral Infection COVID-19
Interventions: Drug: Aterixen
Sponsors: Valenta Pharm JSC
Not yet recruiting
Long COVID Brain Fog: Cognitive Rehabilitation Trial - Conditions: Long COVID; Brain Fog; Cognitive Impairment; Cognitive Dysfunction; Post-Acute COVID-19 Syndrome
Interventions: Behavioral: Speed of Processing Training; Behavioral: In-lab Instrumental Activities of Daily Living Training; Behavioral: In-lab Brain Health Training; Behavioral: Transfer Package; Behavioral: Follow Up Phone Calls; Behavioral: Vocational Rehabilitation; Behavioral: Peer Mentoring
Sponsors: University of Alabama at Birmingham; National Institute on Disability, Independent Living, and Rehabilitation Research
Not yet recruiting
Promising role of Vitamin D and plant metabolites against COVID-19: Clinical trials review - Vitamin D possesses immunomodulatory qualities and is protective against respiratory infections. Additionally, it strengthens adaptive and cellular immunity and boosts the expression of genes involved in oxidation. Experts suggested taking vitamin D supplements to avoid and treat viral infection and also COVID-19, on the other hand, since the beginning of time, the use of plants as medicines have been vital to human wellbeing. The WHO estimates that 80 % of people worldwide use plants or herbsâŠ
Plant-Derived Antioxidants for Management of COVID-19: A Comprehensive Review of Molecular Mechanisms - We aimed to review the literature to introduce some effective plant-derived antioxidants to prevent and treat COVID-19. Natural products from plants are excellent sources to be used for such discoveries. Among different plant-derived bioactive substances, components including luteolin, quercetin, glycyrrhizin, andrographolide, patchouli alcohol, baicalin, and baicalein were investigated for several viral infections as well as SARS-COV-2. The mechanisms of effects detected for these agents wereâŠ
SARS-CoV-2 viral persistence in lung alveolar macrophages is controlled by IFN-Îł and NK cells - Severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus 2 (SARS-CoV-2) RNA generally becomes undetectable in upper airways after a few days or weeks postinfection. Here we used a model of viral infection in macaques to address whether SARS-CoV-2 persists in the body and which mechanisms regulate its persistence. Replication-competent virus was detected in bronchioalveolar lavage (BAL) macrophages beyond 6 months postinfection. Viral propagation in BAL macrophages occurred from cell to cell and wasâŠ
A novel cell-permeable peptide prevents protein sumoylation and supports the mislocalization and aggregation of TDP-43 - SUMOylation is a post-translational modification (PTM) that exerts a regulatory role in different cellular processes, including protein localization, aggregation, and biological activities. It consists of the dynamic formation of covalent isopeptide bonds between a family member of the Small Ubiquitin Like Modifiers (SUMOs) and the target proteins. Interestingly, it is a cellular mechanism implicated in several neurodegenerative pathologies and potentially it could become a new therapeuticâŠ
Much ado about nothing? Discrepancy between the available data on the antiviral effect of hydroxychloroquine in March 2020 and its inclusion in COVID-19 clinical trials and outpatient prescriptions - CONCLUSIONS: The number and size of (H)CQ clinical trials for COVID-19 launched in 2020 were not supported by the literature published before April 2020.
Type 1 interferon auto-antibodies are elevated in patients with decompensated liver cirrhosis - Patients with decompensated liver cirrhosis, in particular those classified as Childs-Pugh class C, are at increased risk of severe COVID-19 upon infection with SARS-CoV-2. The biological mechanisms underlying this are unknown. We aimed to examine the levels of serum intrinsic antiviral proteins as well as alterations in the innate antiviral immune response in patients with decompensated liver cirrhosis. Serum from 53 SARS-CoV-2 unexposed and unvaccinated individuals, with decompensated liverâŠ
Surface enhanced Raman scattering investigation of tecovirimat on silver, gold and platinum loaded silica nanocomposites: Theoretical analysis (DFT) and molecular modeling - As of today, there have been 612 million confirmed cases of coronavirus disease (COVID-19) around the world, with over 6 million fatalities. Tecovirimat (TPOXX) is an anti-viral drug, and it was the first drug approved for the treatment of anti-pox virus in the US. However, the effectiveness of this drug against COVID-19 has not yet been explored. Since TPOXX is an anti-viral drug, an attempt has been made to determine its ability to act as a COVID inhibitor. Recent medical advances haveâŠ
Plasma cell leukemia in a 34-year-old male: rare scenario case report - CONCLUSION: This report showcases a rare age presentation with unique manifestations of secondary plasma cell leukaemia. Multiple myeloma should be a differential diagnosis for cases with unexplained back pain despite an unclassical age.
Exploring Pharmacy Student Experiences with Student Debt and Perspectives on Future Burnout and Loan Relief - CONCLUSION: Pharmacy students burdened with debt described a variety of different experiences and attitudes toward that debt and provided their perspectives on how student debt influences short-term education and career decisions. While students accept the trade-off of debt for their education as an inevitable burden, reported coping mechanisms and strategies shared suggest some solutions may be available to ameliorate this burden.
Potential PDE4B inhibitors as promising candidates against SARS-CoV-2 infection - Severe acute respiratory syndrome coronavirus-2 (SARS-CoV-2) is an RNA virus belonging to the coronavirus family responsible for coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19). It primarily affects the pulmonary system, which is the target of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), for which many new compounds have been developed. In this study, phosphodiesterase 4 (PDE4) inhibitors are being investigated. The inhibition of PDE4 enzyme produces anti-inflammatory and bronchodilator effects in the lungâŠ
Proteomic analyses of smear-positive/negative tuberculosis patients uncover differential antigen-presenting cell activation and lipid metabolism - CONCLUSION: Our study provides valuable insights into the differential molecular mechanisms underlying SNPT and SPPT, reveals the critical role of antigen-presenting cell activation in SNPT for effectively clearing the majority of Mtb in bodies, and shows the possibility of APC activation as a novel TB treatment strategy.
Antrodia cinnamomea May Interfere with the Interaction Between ACE2 and SARS-CoV-2 Spike Protein in vitro and Reduces Lung Inflammation in a Hamster Model of COVID-19 - CONCLUSION: AC shows potential as a nutraceutical for reducing the risk of SARS-CoV-2 infection by disrupting the interaction between ACE2 and the SARS-CoV-2 spike protein, and for preventing COVID-19-associated lung inflammation.
Computational Screening Using a Combination of Ligand-Based Machine Learning and Molecular Docking Methods for the Repurposing of Antivirals Targeting the SARS-CoV-2 Main Protease - CONCLUSION: Results demonstrated the efficiency of LBVS combined with MD. This combined strategy provided positive evidence showing that the top screened drugs, including CCX-140, which had the lowest MD score, can be reasonably advanced to the in vitro phase. This combined method may accelerate the discovery of therapies for novel or orphan diseases from existing drugs.
Defining neutralization and allostery by antibodies against COVID-19 variants - The changing landscape of SARS-CoV-2 Spike protein is linked to the emergence of variants, immune-escape and reduced efficacy of the existing repertoire of anti-viral antibodies. The functional activity of neutralizing antibodies is linked to their quaternary changes occurring as a result of antibody-Spike trimer interactions. Here, we reveal the conformational dynamics and allosteric perturbations linked to binding of novel human antibodies and the viral Spike protein. We identified epitopeâŠ
Impact of influenza immunity on the mortality among older adults hospitalized with COVID-19: a retrospective cohort study - It has been suggested that the outcomes of coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) are better in individuals having recently received an influenza vaccine than in non-vaccinated individuals. We hypothesized that this association depends on the humoral responses against influenza viruses. We aim to assess the relationship between the humoral immunity against influenza and the 3-month all-cause mortality among hospitalized older patients with COVID-19. We performed an exploratory retrospective studyâŠ
Donald Trumpâs Sons Get Challenged on the Witness Stand - Eric and Donald, Jr., claim they had nothing to do with the fraudulent financial statements that inflated their fatherâs worth, but prosecutors provided evidence to the contrary. - link
Will Sam Bankman-Friedâs Guilty Verdict Change Anything? - The former C.E.O. of FTX now faces up to a hundred and ten years in prison. But, beyond resetting his personal fate, itâs not yet clear what the trial accomplished. - link
Not All of Americaâs National-Security Threats Are Overseas - Congressâs foreign-aid follies with Israel and Ukraine, and the fear of Trump in 2024. - link
What Will It Take to Win Brooklynâs First Majority-Asian District? - In a recently redrawn City Council district, two Chinese American candidates are both trying to claim the mantle of âpublic safety.â - link
Why Antisemitism Led a DeSantis Ally to Jump to Trump - A Florida Republican on how, if Trump were President, the war in Israel âwouldnât have happened.â - link
+What history can â and canât â tell us about the hope for a Gaza ceasefire. +
++The last time that Israel and Hamas engaged in hostilities that had the potential to ignite a larger war was in May 2021. At the time, National Security Adviser Jake Sullivan flew to Cairo and worked with Egyptian officials to negotiate a ceasefire. He drew from his own experience: In November 2012, as an aide to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, he and his Egyptian counterparts had locked in a ceasefire after a different outburst of conflict. +
++So I found it revealing about where this war currently stands, and how different it is from the past, when Clinton dismissed any possibility of a ceasefire while speaking last week at Rice Universityâs Baker Institute. âPeople who are calling for a ceasefire now do not understand Hamas. That is not possible,â she said. âIt would be such a gift to Hamas, because they would spend whatever time there was a ceasefire in effect rebuilding their armaments, creating stronger positions to be able to fend off an eventual assault by the Israelis.â +
++Historically, these ceasefires have worked for both Israel and Hamas, until they havenât. +
++But the previous logic of Israel-Hamas wars no longer holds after the October 7 attacks on Israel, in which 1,400 people were killed and 242 people were taken hostage. That has fundamentally altered Israelâs security thinking: It now wants to eliminate Hamas entirely. Israelâs existential catastrophe has changed its approach to security, as weâre seeing through its intensive bombardment of Gaza and its ongoing ground incursion, with more than 9,000 Palestinians killed, including 3,000 children. +
++âThe technique before was to convince the Israelis that Hamas can be under control,â Nabeel Khoury, a career US diplomat focused on the Middle East who retired as a minister-counselor, told me. âIsraelis are way beyond that. They want something much more radical than what happened in the past.â +
++The fact that nearly everyone powerful in the US is also rejecting a ceasefire now doesnât mean one is impossible. What it shows is that Israel just doesnât want one, period, and the US has largely followed Israelâs lead. +
++The old paradigm of ceasefires between Israel and Hamas appears to have been broken, but that doesnât mean that the many examples of the two parties engaging in talks and upholding agreements are not relevant. Even with Israel locked in what it sees as an existential battle with Hamas, the door isnât, and canât be, totally closed to diplomacy. +
++There are lessons about who can exert pressure; who has the expertise to work with Hamas; how these talks happen behind closed doors; and, crucially, how the US can play a key role in Israelâs decision-making. +
++With Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu insisting Friday that Israel will continue its military operations in Gaza âwith full force,â it seems that a ceasefire will only come from a US initiative. Biden hinted as much and discussed the need for a humanitarian âpauseâ and the release of hostages when interrupted by a protester at a Minnesota event on Wednesday, and the next day Secretary of State Antony Blinken traveled to the Middle East. As the death toll among Palestinians has grown, the Biden administration has continually readjusted its language with a recognition of the humanitarian catastrophe in Gaza and the need for a political process that would culminate in a Palestinian state. +
+ ++But perhaps the most important lesson to take from those ceasefires past is that they were, in a certain sense, failures: They couldnât hold in the long-term because they were not tied to a bigger political framework that could lead to a Palestinian state alongside Israel. They ultimately proved unsatisfactory both for the situation of Palestinians in Gaza, and throughout the occupied territories, and for Israelâs own sense of security. That they were ceasefires alone meant they wouldnât lead to anything that could secure the future for Israelis and Palestinians. +
++However this immediate violence ends â Israel declaring victory, a ceasefire, or something else â ultimately the war will only be resolved by difficult diplomacy and US leadership toward a Palestinian state. +
++Since 2007, Hamas and the state of Israel have existed in a âviolent equilibrium,â as Tareq Baconi of the Palestinian research network Al-Shabaka describes it. That year, Hamas seized control of the Gaza Strip after winning the 2006 Palestinian elections; Israel then imposed a crippling blockade on the territory. That led to extreme rates of poverty in Gaza; over 60 percent of people need food assistance, and access to health care is extremely limited. About a quarter of Palestinians in Gaza, and nearly 80 percent of youth, are unemployed. +
++âWhat we see is every few years, or really every few months, a situation occurs where Hamas fires rockets at Israel, when the restrictions of the blockade become too stifling, and essentially force an escalation where a ceasefire is eventually negotiated, and Israel is forced to ease restrictions into the blockade,â Baconi said recently on The Dig podcast. +
++A review of the recent Israel-Hamas wars shows that after each conflict stopped, that violent equilibrium was restored. At times there were peace talks, but they were not really tied to a bigger political process that could lead to a larger settlement of the Israel-Palestine conflict. +
++Israelâs Operation Cast Lead in 2008-2009 lasted 22 days. In the conflict, 1,400 Palestinians, among them at least 759 civilians, were killed, as well as 10 Israeli soldiers and three civilians. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice worked to secure a ceasefire. âWe need urgently to conclude a ceasefire that can endure and that can bring real security,â she told the UN on January 6, 2009. âThis would begin a period of true calm that includes an end to rocket, mortar, and other attacks on Israelis, and allows for the cessation of Israelâs military offensive.â +
+ + ++This all came on the eve of President Barack Obama coming into the White House. He initially prioritized talks between Israel and the Palestine Liberation Organization, and put limited pressure on Israel to halt the construction of new settlements in the occupied West Bank. Despite that, little progress was made. +
++That ceasefire held until November 2012, with an eight-day conflict between Israel and Hamas; 167 Palestinians and six Israelis died. Clinton was secretary of state, and Sullivan played a key role in negotiating a ceasefire. +
++That truce broke in the summer of 2014, when a 50-day war between Israel and Hamas left 2,251 Palestinians dead, among them 1,462 civilians, and 67 Israeli soldiers and six civilians. Talks between Israelis and Palestinians had collapsed the spring before and have not relaunched since. +
++Each time, the US and Egypt have played important roles in cementing these ceasefires, even as Egypt and Israel restricted movement in and out of the occupied territory of Gaza. Since the US designates Hamas a terrorist group, it depends on third parties for talks with the militant group. âNegotiating between Israel and Hamas has been one of the niche kind of activities that Egypt specialized in,â Ezzedine Choukri Fishere, a former Egyptian diplomat, told me. âFor the last 16 years, the Egyptian policy on Gaza has been a stopgap â de-escalate.â In more recent years, Turkey and Qatar have also held indirect talks with Hamas. +
++When the Biden White House faced another Israel-Hamas conflict in May 2021, US officials followed the playbook from the two wars that happened under Obama â prevent UN Security Council resolutions and work the backchannel with Hamas. The war lasted 11 days in May 2021, killing 230 Palestinians and 12 Israelis. The lesson Biden took from the Obama years was that all clashes with Israel must happen in private if at all, that there should be no daylight between the countries, and that conflict between allies is detrimental to the point of being unbearable. +
++So Bidenâs method to ending the May 2021 conflict was quiet diplomacy with Prime Minister Netanyahu. The US blocked United Nations resolutions and stood by Israel, to a point. Biden âheld his tongueâ when he learned that Netanyahuâs military operation had âno defined objective,â as journalist Franklin Foer recounts in his book The Last Politician. After four phone calls between the two leaders, Biden was blunt to Netanyahu: âHey man, weâre out of runway here ⊠Itâs over.â And then it was. +
++This Middle East war could last longer than any recent previous conflict between Israel and Hamas. The scope of Hamasâs attack, the ensuing Israeli bombardment and ground incursion, and the level of the death toll is already much more drastic than previous rounds of violence. +
++The understandable focus on the destruction of Gaza and the tremendous loss of human life there perhaps obscures what has really happened from an Israeli point of view. âI donât think thereâs enough appreciation of the impact of October 7,â Fishere, who is now a visiting professor at Dartmouth College, told me. âFor Israel, this is a new moment. This is not a repetition.â +
++Netanyahu says Israelâs goals are the elimination of Hamas and the return of hostages. +
+ ++But itâs not at all clear how Hamas could be removed with force alone â and should it be, what party would govern Gaza. US and Israeli officials have floated trial balloons in unattributed quotes to the press that include a new Palestinian Authority, Egypt stepping in, or a multinational force, and Biden has urged Israel not to take over the territory. +
++None of those would be good options. Any day-after plan for Gaza would require some buy-in from Hamas leadership â an agreement that its military wing and affiliated forces like Islamic Jihad would drop their weapons. +
++This is the paradox: The ferocity of October 7 has convinced Israeli leadership that it must utterly destroy Hamas, yet there is little evidence it can achieve that goal. In the past, Israel was satisfied with damaging the militant group before settling into a ceasefire state. But this time, Israel is not seeking the kind of cessation of hostilities that defined the end to four previous rounds of conflict. âThe only possible ceasefire would be a ceasefire that disarmed Hamas,â Fishere says. âAnd I donât think anybody can offer that.â +
++But there is another difference to this war: Hamas is holding 242 hostages, a number that dwarfs previous instances of hostage-taking. That gives Hamas leverage, and pretty much precludes Israel from agreeing to unilaterally stop its assault on Gaza. +
++In public, there seems to be no path forward: Hamas has said that it wonât negotiate over the hostages until there is a ceasefire, and Israel seems to say it would only go for a ceasefire with unconditional release of hostages. +
++What has been floated is a temporary ceasefire â a situation where Hamasâs hostages are exchanged, in essence, for a respite from the fighting and, likely, the release of Palestinian prisoners. +
++The exact mechanics of such exchanges are closely held secrets. The Israeli peace activist Gershon Baskin worked directly with a Hamas interlocutor to secure the release of Gilad Shalit, who in 2011 was exchanged for 1,000 Palestinian prisoners and Hamas members. âNegotiating for the release of hostages may also be less popular this time around,â Baskin wrote in an opinion column for the New York Times earlier this month. The price for the hostages would be just as high as before. +
+++Israel has a moral responsibility to bring home all of the hostages. Israel failed to provide security for them. The proposal: all of the hostages for all of the Palestinian prisoners is very difficult to accept but Israel must consider it & if yes, it has to be done quickly. +
+â Gershon Baskin ۏ۱ێÙÙ ŰšŰ§ŰłÙÙÙ (@gershonbaskin) October 30, 2023 +
+Netanyahu says the Israeli military incursion will press Hamas to release the hostages. But for now, Israelâs ongoing bombardment of Gaza has seemingly not encouraged Hamas to release hostages. âMy analysis is that this Israeli government has in the most cynical way simultaneously written off the lives of the hostages, while using them as political capital in convincing the world that no one can tell them what they can or canât do in Gaza,â Lara Friedman, president of the Foundation for Middle East Peace, told me. âThe hostages will be released despite the government of Israel, not because of it.â +
++The Financial Times was the first international editorial page to call for a ceasefire. UNICEF, the World Health Organization, the World Food Program, the United Nations secretary general, and the Pope now have, too. +
++Israel categorically rejects these calls. Yet the composite picture is of dwindling international support for Israelâs military campaign, which appears to be putting some pressure on Biden. You can see it in the very gradual shift in action and tone from the administration. Vice President Kamala Harris called for âthe urgent need to increase humanitarian aid to civilians in Gaza.â Blinken arrived in the Middle East and pushed Netanyahu to temporarily pause its military campaign to allow in humanitarian aid. +
++There is no easy way to secure a ceasefire. One is only likely to happen if the US and Israel together felt like enough Hamas leaders have been taken out and their military capabilities sufficiently immobilized, and that there is a chance to negotiate some kind of hostage exchange. +
++While the previously negotiated ceasefires have limited applicability, they do offer faint lessons. One: Third parties like Egypt, Qatar, and Turkey will be integral to the process. +
++Khoury, the former American diplomat who is now at the Arab Center Washington DC, says Qatar may have more power to influence Hamas than Egypt. Earlier this week, the head of the Mossad, Israelâs intelligence services, traveled to Doha. âIf Israel and the US would give the Qataris a carte blanche, they can come up with something,â Khoury told me. âBut the US and Israel will have to be ready to accept a continued role for Hamas in some capacity. They could say disarm Hamas. But if they wish to obliterate Hamas, Qatar cannot help with that.â +
++Two: The US has to play a major role behind the scenes. At some point, Bidenâs team is going to spell out more clearly to the Israelis that the US is not going to countenance this anymore. +
++And, perhaps most importantly, three: There must be a clearer picture of what happens after any ceasefire. +
++âIf thereâs no political path to deal with the question of occupation, then whatever Israel will do now, regardless of how long itâs gonna take and how many people gonna kill, is not gonna resolve the issue,â Fishere told me. âIt will come back and hit us again, at some point in the future, probably not too far.â +
++Biden has a Plan B for student debt. Will it survive the Supreme Court? +
++For as long as heâs been president, Joe Biden has been vexed by student loans. +
++His primary opponents pushed him to endorse mass loan forgiveness legislation during the 2020 campaign, then pressured him in the days after the election to wipe out hundreds of billions of dollars in debt with the stroke of his executive pen. +
++After years of back-and-forth deliberations, he finally announced an enormous loan forgiveness initiative last year, only to have the Supreme Court declare it unconstitutional. +
++Meanwhile, as the pandemic stretched for months and then years, he extended the moratorium on loan payments seven times, until congressional Republicans used the threat of financial armageddon to force the collection system back into operation, even as they under-funded the federal agency responsible for collections. Only weeks after payments became due again in October, the Department of Education levied stiff financial penalties on student loan servicers for bungling the job. +
++But Biden is not giving up. On Monday, the Department of Education announced new plans to forgive billions of dollars in loans held by struggling borrowers. If it works, people who have spent decades under the yoke of monthly payments will finally be free of their obligations. The question is whether the Supreme Court will once again blow up Bidenâs loan forgiveness ambitions before they leave the ground. +
++Bidenâs first loan forgiveness initiative would have forgiven $10,000 from nearly every federal student loan, and up to $20,000 for low-income borrowers. The Court ruled that the plan was too big â âstaggering by any measure,â in the words of Chief Justice John Roberts â and was not based on clear legal authority provided by Congress. The new Biden forgiveness plan is based on a different federal law, the Higher Education Act, and â since the Courtâs six-member conservative majority made clear that any attempt to simply replicate the original plan was doomed to fail â itâs less sweeping than its predecessor. +
++Rather than provide the same benefit to every borrower regardless of circumstance, Bidenâs Plan B targets specific groups of borrowers who are especially in need and shapes their relief accordingly. They fall into four categories: +
++Notably, the Department of Education included people who took out federal loans through private banks as candidates for loan forgiveness, a group that was cut out of the previous Biden plan. The Department also proposed developing a fifth category of borrowers experiencing âfinancial hardshipâ and released a white paper exploring what that phrase might mean. The potential ideas range from having significant medical or child care expenses to dropping out of college, going bankrupt, being old, and points in between. +
++Even if everything goes according to plan, it will take some time to implement the new Biden loan plan. The Department of Education is still in the middle of a lengthy, technically complicated rulemaking process that will require a lot of meetings, opportunities for public comment, responses to the public comment, and so forth. That wonât conclude until well into 2024, and forgiveness wouldnât occur until 2025. +
++Thereâs a significant likelihood, however, that everything wonât go according to plan. The Supreme Court looms over the whole process like an angry pantheon of debtor-hating deities. Is âmake interest payments for a while and then have the whole principal forgivenâ literally the way Justice Clarence Thomas financed the purchase of a $267,230 recreational vehicle? Apparently! Will he feel some obligation to approve the same deal for millions of struggling college students? Maybe not! +
++The Department of Education is clearly trying to craft a legally defensible loan scheme. The challenge is that the legal theory itâs defending against, the so-called âmajor questions doctrineâ prohibiting the executive branch from implementing expansive new interpretations of federal statute, was fabricated from whole cloth by the Courtâs conservative majority just last year. The Department is acting in the spirit of the doctrine by limiting forgiveness to âcertain limited circumstances,â per Robertsâs majority opinion striking down the original Biden plan. But opponents will likely argue that by explicitly creating forgiveness plans for certain groups of borrowers, like public servants, Congress was implicitly limiting the Department of Educationâs authority to unilaterally extend relief to anyone else. +
++So if you have a student loan and havenât started making payments, you should, particularly if you donât make a lot of money and qualify for the brand-new SAVE program, which limits monthly payments to a small percentage of your discretionary income, doesnât allow interest charges to accumulate on top of principal, and forgives some smaller loans in as little as 10 years. +
++The new Biden plan also marks the end of true mass student loan forgiveness as a viable policy, at least for a while. The journey of âforgive all the loansâ from fringe sentiment to a widely accepted part of the Democratic Partyâs domestic policy agenda was a genuine triumph of grassroots activism, and might have succeeded if conservatives hadnât gained a commanding majority on the Court. +
++Even in its more limited form, the Biden loan forgiveness agenda is far more expansive and expensive than anything that seemed possible even a few years ago. But the Supreme Court decision means the administration has had to make hard choices about who deserves student loan forgiveness â and, therefore, who does not. And absent a string of Democratic election victories shifting the balance of power in Congress, new loan forgiveness plans will require assent from six judges who have so far proved hostile to the cause. +
+Documents reveal the untold story of how the natural gas industry infiltrated Americanâs kitchens through the beloved chef. +
++For years on her popular cooking show, The French Chef, Julia Child used a crude, makeshift kitchen that she and her husband would haul to the set for each filming. When she returned to the screen for a new, 13-episode series later in her career, she had one condition: She needed a kitchen that was her own to film in, one âthat we could just walk into and work in and leave.â +
++Child got her wish â thanks to a generous sponsorship from the American Gas Association (AGA), a powerful lobby for gas utilities, which paid for a new kitchen, complete with a four-burner commercial range and a gas oven rotisserie. +
++Her new show, Julia Child & Company, aired in 1978. âWe have a new set, and a new theme song,â she said at the time. And each episode that theme music reached its crescendo, a slide noted a âspecial thanks to The American Gas Association.â +
++Child herself never endorsed products on her shows (regulations around public programming forbade it) and thereâs no evidence to suggest that she was a willing shill of the AGA. But from the industryâs point of view, Child was potent product placement that could help establish the dominance of gas in the American home. âMillions of viewers week after week will be able to watch Julia Child as she stirs food simmering over a gas flame,â read an October 1978 article from the associationâs monthly trade magazine. +
++This was a continuation of a larger campaign called âOperation Attack.â Launched by the AGA in the late 1960s, it employed at the time some of the same experts and public relations firms as the tobacco industry to fend off growing threats to gas. The nation was becoming more environmentally conscious; the fossil-fuel industry feared heightened scrutiny from the newly formed Environmental Protection Agency, and energy price shocks had begun to make alternative fuels more appealing. To make matters worse, new research raised questions about gas stove emissions and impacts on public health. Gas was losing ground to electric competition, but the industry had plans to fight back. +
+ ++Childâs role in this industry battle would be largely forgotten if not for documents unearthed by the climate watchdog group Climate Investigations Center, which shared them with Vox for review. +
++This history adds a new layer to the image of the late TV star, affectionately known as âJooooooliaâ by her fans, who was dedicated to teaching. Julia Child was also a weapon wielded by the fossil fuel lobby. +
++Reached for comment, the Julia Child Foundation, a grantmaking organization that Child established when she was still alive, expressed concern over the legacy of Child, who died in 2004. âWe were unaware of the AGAâs misappropriation of Juliaâs legacy for their own agenda,â Todd Schulkin, the foundationâs executive director, wrote in an email. âJuliaâs legacy was about learning to cook and appreciating what makes for good food, which extended to an embrace of new technology.â +
++Child had many stoves over her five-decade career, but she was famously devoted to one in particular: the Garland, a squat, six-burner gas range Child used in her home kitchen that cemented gas as her recommendation for professional and home chefs alike. The stove was so iconic that the Smithsonian has dedicated an exhibit to it. âIt was a professional gas range, and as soon as I laid eyes on it I knew I must have one,â according to her posthumous memoir published in 2006. âI loved it so much I vowed to take it to my grave!â +
++Decades after Childâs glowing endorsement, gas appliances have come under scrutiny in light of new evidence that they produce pollution linked to asthma and cancer, especially when not vented properly. Climate activists have also put pressure on lawmakers to pass local and state-wide bans on expanding gas infrastructure, to curb harmful emissions driving climate change. +
++But in 2023, a mention doubting the safety of gas stoves made some politicians apoplectic. In January, the Consumer Product Safety Commissionâs Richard Trumka Jr. set off a firestorm for raising the idea of a gas stove ban to which the Republican representative Ronny Jackson from Texas threatened âthey can pry it from my cold dead hands.â +
+ ++How did the gas stove become such a trigger point? Julia Childâs endearing affinity for gas stoves may have had some influence, but the industry was also reaching deep into Hollywood during the 1960s and â70s. +
++As part of a larger campaign, the American Gas Association established a âHollywood Bureauâ staffed with agents whose job was âobtaining publicity favorable to the natural gas industry within the national media of television and motion pictures,â according to AGA Monthly, the trade publication read by tens of thousands of industry professionals. +
++âThe fact that these shows make use of gas appliances is hardly an accident,â one of its trade magazine articles noted. The bureau took credit for gas appliances appearing regularly in 25 primetime television series, periodically in another 12, in eight television movies, and nine feature films. +
++Throughout the 1970s, AGA launched in-show product placements and paid appearances at conferences with celebrities â a kind of prototype of todayâs social media influencer endorsements. The gas stove made appearances alongside stars Mary Tyler Moore and Doris Day. AGA brought football quarterbacks from the Dallas Cowboys and St. Louis Cardinals and famous French chef Jacques PĂ©pin to homebuilders conferences to attract attention. Onlookers who stopped by Pepinâs cooking demonstrations received pamphlets from AGA. +
++The industry fought hard to win favor in American kitchens so that it could generate demand to ensure new homes were built equipped with gas. The industry took out advertising in magazines like Ladiesâ Home Journal, House Beautiful, and Good Housekeeping specifically to target the American housewife. +
++Of course, natural gas utilities werenât the only companies pursuing celebrity endorsements; General Electric hired then-actor Ronald Reagan to appear in widely watched ads for the all-electric home. But the AGA kept an especially close watch on its image. +
++According to an article in its trade magazine, AGAâs influence went so far as to alter scripts that made gas look dangerous. âThis âwatchdogâ function is aided by friends in the industry who alert the bureau to scripts that call for a gas explosion or an asphyxiation,â the article read. âAs a result of the Hollywood Bureauâs efforts last year, four potential damaging and misleading portrayals of gas incidents never reached the air.â The group also detailed efforts to land more pro-gas scripts, working with studios so âan environmentally conscious producer or directorâ might plug the ânon-pollutingâ aspects of ânaturalâ gas in scripts. âIf such a screenplay eventually appears,â AGA Monthly claimed, âit will not be entirely an accident of fate.â +
++In 1977, American Gas Associationâs president gave a sense of the scale of these campaigns, writing âan estimated eight out of 10 Americans saw AGA commercials on major network television in which we appeared as the sponsor of TV spectaculars, major documentaries or sports events.â +
++In the course of reporting this story, Vox reached AGA for comment. A spokesperson for the group declined to answer specific questions but provided a general statement. +
++âThe natural gas industry has collaborated with subject matter experts and credible researchers to develop analysis and scientific studies to inform and educate regulators about the safety of gas cooking appliances and ways to help reduce cooking process emissions, regardless of heating source, from impacting indoor air quality,â AGA spokesperson Emily Carlin wrote in an email. +
++Today, approximately 40 million homes, or about 38 percent of households, cook with gas, and 61 percent of households rely on gas for some other use that includes cooking, water, and space heating, according to the Energy Information Administration. +
++Since at least 2018, gas interests including the AGA, which represents the vast share of the industry, and the American Public Gas Association have hired influencers â though not quite of Julia Childâs caliber â to promote gas stoves on social media like YouTube and Instagram. These ads have been filled with youthful women posing in their stylish kitchens, flaunting the sponsored hashtag #cookingwithgas. +
++One of those influencers is Kate Arends, writer of Wit & Delight, a style website for âdesigning a life well-lived.â In a sponsored blog post, Arends defended her new natural gas fireplace: âWe knew it would be safe and ventilated properlyâa MUST if using natural gas anywhere in your home.â +
++After I first reported on these campaigns in 2020, Sue Kristjansson, who is now president of Berkshire Gas, fretted in an internal company email: âIf we wait to promote natural gas stoves until we have scientific data that they are not causing any air quality issues weâll be done.â +
++AGAâs efforts go beyond hiring influencers. Many of its campaigns aim to thwart environmental regulation. Last year, AGA hired a consulting firm, Gradient, which has a track record defending tobacco and chemical companies, to dispute research from scientists on gas stove emissions. +
++Gas utility ratepayers ultimately help pay the tab for these efforts. State utility commissions allow the gas industry to add a fee â usually just pennies to every consumerâs gas bill â so it can recoup its membership fees to the American Gas Association. Though small in scale, these fees add up to an expansive war chest in the tens of millions of dollars annually, according to the utility watchdog group Energy and Policy Institute. Environmental groups have called on FERC, the agency that regulates interstate gas and electricity commerce, to close what they see as a loophole that holds ratepayers captive â using funds meant for consumer education, not âpolitical activity that does not benefit them.â They are also pressuring AGAâs utility members to exit, asking seven CEOs to abandon AGA because it is undermining their companiesâ stated climate goals. +
+ ++In addition to hiring social media personalities and sympathetic scientists, AGA and gas utilities also seem to perpetuate disinformation. When the Department of Energy proposed new efficiency regulations for stoves, a process required by law, AGA suggested this spring it amounted to a de facto ban. In reality, a limited number of older, less efficient models would be phased out after 2027, with no effect on existing gas appliances. +
++Even so, this June, House Republicans passed a bill prohibiting the federal government from issuing any kind of regulations around gas stoves, which would interfere with the Department of Energyâs ability to set new efficiency standards. +
++The AGA submitted comments to the Department of Energy in response to a proposed regulation to strengthen stove efficiency standards, with a nod to Child: âThankfully, Julia Child was able to cook her masterful creations and have her gas range displayed in the Smithsonianâs National Museum of American History before DOE had a chance to ban it.â +
+Eng vs Aus | England invite Australia to bat - All-rounders Marcus Stoinis and Cameron Green came in for injured Glenn Maxwell and Mitchell Marsh
ICC World Cup | Board secretary resigns following Sri Lankaâs underwhelming run in World Cup - Sri Lanka lost to India by a massive 302 runs in Mumbai on Thursday. They are virtually out of the semifinal race
Ten Hag says Rashford going to a nightclub party after Unitedâs heavy City defeat was âunacceptableâ - The Man United manager said it was an âinternal matterâ when asked if Rashford had been fined for an incident
Pak vs NZ | Pakistan ahead on DLS par score vs New Zealand as rain stops play - Pakistan were placed comfortably at 160 for one in their chase of 402 runs for victory when rain stopped play with 21.3 overs bowled
Ankle injury rules Hardik Pandya out of World Cup, Prasidh Krishna to replace him in India squad - Pandya had hurt his left ankle while fielding of his own bowling in the game against Bangladesh
Former Vice-President Venkaiah Naidu offers prayers at Tirumala temple -
No one will be spared in Delhi Excise Policy case including Telangana CMâs daughter: Union Minister Anurag Thakur - The Information and Broadcasting Minister told reporters in Hyderabad that the BJP does not have any understanding with the BRS.
Kerala-based institute has technology for hospitals to convert biomedical waste into soil manure - The new technology, developed by National Institute for Interdisciplinary Science and Technology, will eliminate hardships involved in incinerating biomedical waste collected from hospitals
Nigerian held on the charge of peddling drugs -
Enyclopaedia published -
Tuscany storm and floods ravage central Italy leaving six dead - Six people are confirmed dead and several more are missing as winds and rain buffet parts of Italy.
Germany: Illegal migration rise prompts border crackdown - Soaring numbers of illegal migrants is sharpening a growing debate about migration in Germany.
Maersk cuts 10,000 jobs as shipping demand falls - One of the worldâs largest export firms reported a huge drop in profits as freight costs have plunged.
Tycoon Kaoru Nakajima hires iconic Palermo opera for birthday bash - Japanese businessman Kaoru Nakajima has reportedly spent a fortune renting the Sicilian cityâs swankiest spots.
German vice-chancellor Habeck hits out against rising antisemitism - German Vice-Chancellor Robert Habeck criticises Islamists, the far right and political left.
How long will Jeff Bezos continue to subsidize his New Shepard rocket? - âItâs definitely a money loser. Always has been.â - link
Perfect Dark finally gets the full-featured PC port it deserves - Decompilation project adds mouse-and-keyboard controls, upscaled graphics and more. - link
Intelâs failed 64-bit Itanium CPUs die another death as Linux support ends - Intel stopped selling the last Itanium processors in 2021. - link
The UAW beat the big three; Elon Muskâs Tesla is among its next targets - Toyota has already given its workers a pay raise in response to the UAW contract. - link
AI helps 3D printers âwriteâ with coiling fluid ropes like Jackson Pollock - Reinforcement learning lets 3D printers exploit, not suppress, coiling instabilities. - link
A husband and wife are having issues in the bedroom. The wife canât orgasm because itâs too damn hot. -
++They see a sex therapist, and he recommends that they have a constant supply of cool air in the bedroom, so the man asks his best friend to waft a towel while he and his wife make love. Begrudgingly, the friend submits and says yes. +
++After 20 minutes of lovemaking, the woman is no closer to orgasm, so the friend wafting the towel recommends that they switch places. So the friend is now having sex with the woman while the husband wafts the towel. +
++After two minutes, the woman starts to tremble and lets out an incredible cry as she reaches the most intense orgasm she has ever had. +
++The husband looks at his friend, and proudly proclaims, âNow that, my friend, is how you waft a fucking towel.â +
+ submitted by /u/Powersourze
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Once there was a womenâs bowling team. Everyone on the bowling team was so-so at bowling, with the exception of two women. -
++One of the two women was named Martha. Martha was absolutely abysmal at bowling. Every single game, she got at least nine gutter balls. +
++The other woman was Linda, and she was the best player who had ever set foot in the bowling alley. Every time the team won a bowling match, Linda was responsible for scoring most of the points. +
++Because she was so good at bowling, and because she was such a nice lady, Linda was very popular among her teammates. But there was just one thing about her. +
++At the end of every single game, Linda said, âNext game, I might be five minutes late.â Her teammates found it really annoying. She almost always showed up right on time, but still, she always said, âNext game, I might be five minutes late.â +
++The one who was most annoyed by this was Martha. One day, right after her bowling her sixth gutter ball of the day, she decided that she wanted to find out why Linda always said that. She went up to Linda just as she had bowled her eighth strike of the day, when she noticed something that made her forget about the five-minutes-late-thing. +
++âLinda,â she said, âare you bowling left-handed today?â +
++âThat I am.â +
++âI could have sworn you bowled right-handed at our last game!â +
++âThat I did.â +
++For the rest of the game, and for each game over the next few weeks, all that Martha and her teammates could talk about was the hand Linda was using to bowl. +
++âSheâs bowling righty today!â +
++âI remembered she bowled lefty at her first game!â +
++âCould she be alternating hands?â +
++âNo, I remember last month she bowled three games righty in a row!â +
++Finally, Martha decided to ask Linda how she decided which hand to bowl with. +
++âSimple,â replied Linda. âI used to be just as bad at bowling as you were. Then I started dating a guy who always slept in the nude, and on his back. Now every morning, when I wake up, I look at my boyfriend. If his penis is hanging over his left leg, I bowl lefty. If itâs hanging over his right leg, I bowl righty. This may sound strange, but ever since I started this method Iâve become better at bowling than Iâve ever been!â +
++Martha realized that her boyfriend always slept naked on his back, so she decided that she should try this method too. Whenever she woke up and saw her boyfriendâs penis hanging over his left leg, she bowled lefty. Whenever she woke up and saw her boyfriendâs penis hanging over his right leg, she bowled righty. This method worked surprisingly well. Martha, with her new hand-switching method, now got as many strikes as she had once gotten gutter balls. The team entered a national tournament, and Linda and Martha single-handedly got them to the finals. +
++On the morning of the finals, Martha woke up and looked at her boyfriend to see which leg his penis was hanging over⊠but he had an erection. Now she had no way of knowing which hand to bowl with. +
++When Martha arrived at the bowling alley, she once again asked Linda for help. âWhat do you do when your boyfriend has an erection?â he asked. +
++With a sly grin on her face, Linda responded, âWhy do you think I always say, âNext game, I might be five minutes lateâ?â +
+ submitted by /u/wimpykidfan37
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Handjob -
++My wife gave me a handjob the other day using Vaseline. I came three times trying to wash that shit off. +
+ submitted by /u/Powersourze
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I used to love joking about anal sex until I actually tried it. -
++Now Iâm slightly torn⊠+
+ submitted by /u/LetMeExplainDis
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What do you get when you cross a hippie and a ninja? -
++Peace and Quiet. +
+ submitted by /u/wolf805
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